P.A.P. Smears

Yeah, I was also laughing like crazy when I thought about an appropriate title for having evidences on my 'patience-&-perseverance'... woot! 'I Try' by Macy Gray is now on the radio... what a great Monday morning!

'Goodbye & I choke... try to walk away but I stumble... though I try to hide it, it's clear... la-la-la' 

Anyways, last night the service was really one of the most heart-felt moments I ever had- it wasn't really a topic people are looking forward to hear, but simple words like patience & perseverance echoed through my ears that gave me some realizations in life.

So the topic was actually one of your favorites too- SUFFERING (lol).

We all, if not underwent, are undergoing with a lot of sufferings right now- financial crisis, job promotions (worst, unemployment), retirement, pressures from our peers & parents, being gossiped about something you did, losing some of the closest friends you have, or being hated by everyone.

Suffering, how much we try to get away from it, really is a normal part of life. I hear people saying 'why me, Lord?', 'it's not fair...' or (your fave) 'out of eight billion people in this world, I was chosen to...' (blah-blah-blah).

I have this friend who is in a relationship with someone who is not that physically-well, & she keeps asking me the same questions too. WHY? Why do we feel that God wasn't there when we are asking for His help?

There are actually three reasons why we have suffering in this world *couple of deep breaths*:

1. Because of the people's wrongdoings- which is actually true. Ever heard someone found peace when he just committed a sin?

2. We live in a fallen world- No matter how much we try to deny that fact, it's still part of our reality. 'Why is this man blind when he was born?'... because we live in a fallen world. (1st Peter 4:15)

3. We suffer for righteousness sake- When everything is lost, God wants us to turn to Him.

When I think about these reasons, I was thinking about how it really sucks for us. But you know what, we're actually have the power to overcome these sufferings in life.

How? Well, we just have to become like the farmers. What the heck?

Yes! It's true. When a farmer plants his seed, he expects a harvest. But before that harvest, he knows that there will be seasonal disasters that can ruin his crops- storms, locusts, drought, etc.

Why does he have to plant his seeds & expect a harvest when he knows there will be many natural destructions that can hinder his harvest? That's actually the point of the story.

As said on the book of James 5:8, God is a constant God- no matter how much we suffer, God is still willing to give you what we need, all we have to do is to stand firm, have faith, patience & perseverance.

Sometimes we always grow impatient when it comes to asking God something we like- that's what I feel now for my iPhone, my driving lessons, & dad's car (lol). But he reminded me that sometimes my time & God's wasn't really jiving (thank you mom for that word) at all.

Like a farmer, we just have to believe that in the end of all those sufferings, God will find a better path for us... & it's gonna be so worth it in the end.

In the midst of all those trials & tribulations, I know we're not alone- a good fact that eases up our burdens. Our God, family & friends will always be there to keep us sane enough to overcome all these.

Sometimes we just have to be messed up... to step up.

Patience & Perseverance- what evidences can you prove to yourself how much you can endure the sufferings just to overcome them?

It's really unbelievable how much I'm looking forward spending time with some of the people I love. Today, I'm gonna go to C.H.I.L.D. (but first, I'm gonna pack some old clothes & I have to look for 'pogs', my promise to Mark) to visit those angels & then go watch a movie with Markie & Mafe, the 'birthweek' celebrant.

I have to say I'm really moved by the support you're giving me these past few days. All of you bloggers & readers really made my heart grew bigger & I just can't believe the efforts you're giving me whenever I needed something. I love you all & thank you so much! The nominations are still up so thank you in advance for those who nominated me. God bless & have a happy Monday morning!

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D

Faulty Filiation

At times I get to be jealous at other people who are close to their siblings; not that I don't have a good relationship with my little brother, it's just that it's hard to understand him. I think we just grew both mentally & emotionally separated for the last seventeen years of our ties.

I'm really close to my little sister though- I tend to regressed so much when it comes to playing with her & how she demonstrates her love by giving us hand-written cards really makes it easy for us to be close. Plus, sisters have always been the one who looks up or supports you in every single way. Unlike my little brother.

So I'm not saying I don't want my him, I do. I think one of the best traits he has is how he shows his concern to you, even though you might think he's just plainly ignoring you. At times he becomes active & bugs the heck out of me, but I think it was his way of showing how he values each & every one of us in the family.

Although it seems like we're that close already, how our misunderstandings & fights really did compensate our good brotherhood; many times they successfully get on your nerves too.


He has a unique pattern of doing chores almost every week; skipping when he doesn't feel like it unless he needs it. Plus, he tends to backfire too much when misconceptions arise. Recently, he deleted some of my songs because I accidentally & unknowingly deleted his freestyle game on my laptop. Good thing I saved all my songs in my flash disk (which Ate Nikki borrowed), but I'm still angry at him for pulling up a stunt like that.

Sometimes... all the time I've been wishing to have a little brother whom I can take care of. Seriously! My little sister even knows that I want a brother who looks like this kid Bugoy Carino or Anton, our 'well-if-you-put-it-that-way' cousin whom I love so much (with Macky of course), or Matt, my best friend's little brother.

So I guess I feel guilty too for constantly thinking about that- it's like saying that I wanted a better brother than I have now. Although I seriously know he doesn't think like that anyhow, I still kinda made a wrong point.

I know sibling rivalry is common in other families. But for me, I think it shouldn't reach up into adulthood (I'm only nineteen years old people!) because that would really cause too much tribulation in the future.

I think one of the most common cause of this problem (based on my experience) was each other's differences- when he perceives this way when you are completely the opposite. Often times we get to have more differences from each other than those of our similarities... or it's just that our similarities are so general we couldn't even relate it to ours.

Surfing the internet or drawing (maybe before), for example, are the things that we really like, but I tend to be more on the productive-side blogging or writing while he's more suited playing online games, which we would argue about when it comes to computer storage.

There maybe instances that I really just wanted to understand him because, after all, I'm his kuya & I should be the one who has to get him. Although I think that rationalization was unfair because it's like giving him the power of authority in the household. The worst part was that he did act like the oldest, & it's like saying I'm not well enough to be the man of the family- not like I wanted more responsibility, I just want the title.

So we tend to punch each other with words & hateful comments- he always say I'm stupid, gay or scared, but he usually curses me cause he knows that would really insult me. Being controlled by my id personality, I constantly warn him that I'm not gonna be helping him on his financial needs when I'm already a nurse in the States now, or I tell him he's just like a devil & God is going to rebuke him. So we're both mean when it comes to fights like these.

I guess it's pretty weird to be making up with him now, since I still have this aversion with him for crossing the line (deleting some of my compositions). Sometimes he's just too much for me to handle, & I really wish I could have a little brother who has my little sister's age or has the same personalities like me.

I could really imagine a life without my brother, & all the time I wish I didn't have any thoughts like that. It makes my world a lot easier, but it makes me much worst than Cain. *Sigh*

Hmm, don't worry about me, I'm not really affected though lol. It's just that I wanted to reconnect with my little brother like how siblings do. I had a good sleep guys, all because of the support you guys are giving me for the last couple of days now.

Special thanks to all the readers from my Friendster, Facebook, Twitter & Plurk. I wanna say welcome to those bloggers who have been featured on my Ads.Blogs.Collabs. page now. This campaign will give good results & new friends, I can tell. Please nominate me also! Thanks guys!

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D

We are BLOG Family!

Hey guys! Sorry for the hold up with this blog post; I was so caught up from keeping myself sane after I checked some of the blogs I visited today. So I'm trying to make a blog family cause I think it's a good, good way to become a junction of some blogs I'll soon be posting at the Ads.Blogs.Collabs. still in Lefty's Journal.

& tell you what, after all those blogs I've seen, I think I've made a decision to create a green-eyed monster out of all the blogs I envied. Seriously! How they organize their site & how they make it look presentable really caught my attention. Plus, their content is so better than the posts I've been blabbing here. Kudos to every blogger who knows how to rule their techno-universe so well.

Anyways, it's been so great having your support with me. I've been so intact lately because of you guys, & it really gives me the energy to have that time to focus on my blog & everything else. So I guess that makes me a true blogger now huh? LOL, so much for making this as a means to build my ego-integrity in the future.

So later tonight, I'm gonna be spending time going through my old clothes just to donate something for those cute little angels in C.H.I.L.D. whom I'll be visiting on Monday, before Mark, Mafe & I watch a movie just to make up for my absence. Anyways, I'm so excited about the visit cause I miss those children already. If you think I'm boasting, I really just wanted to spread how much these kids have touched my life- they're not alone on their own battle against their illness & I am praying to have the money to be able to help them.

So now it's raining outside & I really thank God for it. Yes! Rain's actually a blessing for me (I said it before, it's like the only way how the world cleanses itself from our shortcomings, or something like that). I think I'm gonna make some songs later tonight, since my class will start at one in the afternoon anyways. Hope you had a good day too!

Oh yeah, fellow bloggers, just drop your blog address on the said page & I'll be doing the rest. Take care everyone & please, nominate me in the Nuffnang Blog Awards. Thank you so much for the support again. I love you!

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :)

Lefty's Righty

Last night I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw my Nuffnang blog updates; it was incredibly piled up with too many visits from different countries. I also received a jaw-dropping rank from top 1,020 & now on top 818 just now. Today, I really wanted to give my appreciation to all you readers who were kind enough to pay a visit on my blog &, even more, drop some comments too.

I must’ve been acting weird trying to convince you all to read or visit my blog, & I really did pull off a crazy attempt for my blog to be seen & finally, be nominated. I also finished renovating my other blog that was then called ‘Allanned’ & is now Lefty's Righty which is beautifully renovated but still has the same content with that of the original. It signifies how Lefty’s Journal extends its blogosphere beyond Friendster, solely because of your support.



Everything that I've invested in this blog was so worth it, & I'm happy that people appreciate what I'm trying to do- not really change the world, but share my thoughts, opinions, or my stories too. & how much you were spending time with me thru this site is like having you here beside me. I feel the love, people!

Anyways, it seems like I'm over-crossing my fingers too much. You know, about the Nuffnang Blog Awards thing. I know it's impossible to get so many nominations, & more when it comes to voting, but I really believe that if it's not for you, at least I know that we put up a good fight. It's still weird when I think about it- going to Singapore to compete with this blog (when so much people have more awesome blogs than mine), plus my schedule is gonna be a little problem (but I think it's already the semestral break). It's still amazing if you think about it.

So I just really want to express my biggest appreciation to all of you. If I could kiss or hug you guys right now, I really would! lol. My composition folder is piling up with new cool songs now, but I have to maintain a balance, you get me right? God bless & take care everyone! Hope you had a good day too!

Special thanks to all my Friendster & Facebook readers & my Twitter & Plurk buddies as well. I love you guys!

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne (my second name... for a change) :D

163rd Song- The Long Wait

Nominate me. Twitter, Plurk, Facebook... whatever! :P

Happy Birthday to my friend Maria Felisa I. Fernandez! I'm sure your mom is smiling at you now this very moment. Anticipate your day today! :D

The Long Wait

Allan Aldrinne Leyva

It’s now my turn

To spread my wings

Climb a mountain & shout my dreams

I’ll tell the world

I’m ordinary but I’m real

Yes I’m real

To bring together two worlds in my hands

Through my singing, I know I’ll make amends

Not on me, but to the world we’re living in

I’m ordinary but I’m real

I’m ordinary but I am real

(Chorus)

Finally the long wait is over

Like a silver refined in the fire

& now I stand here before you

I’ve won this call

A gift from above

The long wait is over

I have surpassed

The tribulation fate has gave

Through the subway, I tripped into the darkness

But in the end, there’s a limit to everything

I saw the light & I survived

(Repeat Chorus)

Sometimes I feel lost

Thinking what could have been

I know that I have

My God, my family, my friends

Myself, my hope & my strength

(Repeat Chorus 2x)

& though sometimes I feel

I know I’m not the best in here

But then again, things will end

As long as I believe & dream

The long wait ends here

C.H.I.L.D.

Yesterday, I was supposed to tell you about our last day at the Center for Health Improvement & Life Development, but I really had to start begging for your help when I received that Nuffnang Blog Awards letter in my email. Well, good news because if there is a prize money involved in this contest, it will go automatically to these children who need our help.

But first, I'm really happy about yesterday's socialization on that place. I really had fun bonding with these cute little angels who deserve so much more in life.

We arrived early in the morning to discuss about the last topics about pediatric common disorders, which was really helpful during our Course Audit. Dr. Lorelei, our clinical instructor, is really a good teacher; When the students are reporting in front of the class, she makes sure everyone understands the things that are being told to us.

After that, we had a quick brunch outside & then started talking about the program. So I was assigned for the opening prayer & all that.

We started the program at around twelve o'clock in the afternoon. Mark (who has Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma), May (with Systemic Lupus Erythematosus), John (who has Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia) together with the other kids were present too. That made me smile.

So the socialization went off smoothly. We danced & feasted on the food we prepared, & I gave them cute little gold stars & told them that they symbolize hope if we just pray to God.

The program was a success, but it got me really sad when I remember that this was our last day here, although for sure I'm going to visit them soon. I promised Mark to buy him some 'pogs', May was scheduled for a biopsy so I told her I'm gonna go back. John kissed me on the cheeks when I was carrying him; that was his way of saying 'thank you' &, for me, was his 'you're welcome' too. I really believe that these children are destined for greatness, I just know it.

I tried to hold my tears from falling- success. From that moment, when I left the gates of their sanctuary, I really wish I was a billionaire. Although impossible (for now), I just want to give the treatments they needed. Even though we planned a socialization to help them cope up from their worries, I guess in the end we were the ones who needed that socialization after all. That's why I wanted to thank them for helping us appreciate life in every way. I was planning to go there at the 31st of August, so if you want to come with me, just drop me a message or something.

God bless & have a nice day everyone. I'll start preparing for school now, & thank you for helping me in the nomination phase, I really appreciate all your efforts so much. Please continue supporting alright? Thank you!

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D

Nuffnang Regional Blog Awards 2009

For two years I've been constantly running Lefty's Journal as a lonely blogger who have been receiving little recognition from my efforts. Although I planned to make my blog as a means for my journal entries, I did get many supports from my friends, my co-social networks & fellow bloggers all around the globe. I thank you for the praises & kudos I received.

However, I really want you to make me a huge but simple request- please nominate my blog as The Best Entertainment Blog & especially The Best Hidden Gem in the Nuffnang Regional Blog Awards 2009.

When I received this letter from my email, I really decided to finally make some huge effort to get my blog the utmost attention it should've been having from the past years. I know it seems like I'm boasting, but I really deserved to win the title especially the The Best Hidden Gem, & I know that you know that I really do. If you want to check some other categories, just check what you think what category(ies) fits my blog the most.

I know it's a lot for me to ask you of this, but I really have a good feeling about this & that I know you'll share the word somehow, because this recognition will finally pave the way for us to prove that my blog you've been visiting is really a hidden gem that's waiting to be discovered.

Just think, I get to be one of the best bloggers in the Asia Pacific with your help. This will be the best gift I'll be receiving from all of you this Christmas & I really am gonna appreciate this forever, for I am nothing without your participation & without your presence in my blog. Please give my determination a chance, please?


So you can nominate Lefty's Journal by clicking this form right here. Fill your information first so your vote could be counted in this contest.

Now, like what the picture beside this post is showing, type havock_pone@yahoo.com or aldrinne_leyva@yahoo.com in the nominee email, www.allan-leyva.blog.friendster as my name address, Lefty's Journal as my blog name, country of origin in Philippines, & please check the two categories which are The Best Entertainment Blog & The Best Hidden Gem. After that, click the button 'submit nomination' & please cross your fingers with me. :)

I really owe you for doing this; this is my only chance to be recognized by the blogosphere & I hope you're there when I receive the trophy. I'm really expecting this time. Please visit my blog just once everyday too, even if you don't have to read the content. Your visit will be counted as one blog unique by opening the blog.

My chance in winning the nominations will increase when you kill a little of your time to nominate me. Thank you so much guys! I hope we'll win! God bless & more power to Lefty's Journal!

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D

Retino-BLAST-oma

A 30-hour wakefulness didn't do me any good... cognitively I guess, but physically... I'm not sure. lol

Sorry guys for my absence, but after my crazy Audit class yesterday I went straight to church then went home only to find out my research on Retinoblastoma (cancer of the eye on pediatrics) wasn't saved in my laptop. Good thing I'm just gonna pass it tomorrow.

When I think about it, I'm actually conducive to my assigned topic haha, though I wish my eyes can still take all my strenuous activities. I promise I'm gonna sleep early later tonight; it'll help normalize my body clock.

Anyways, it sucks when you're getting used to your duty then it's all gonna be over tomorrow. I'm sure gonna miss those little angels who were so behaved (& knowledgeable than us lol) when we're trying to study them.

So after our duty I went to a mall near the venue & had lunch there. It's kinda weird eating alone; I don't know why but it's actually the first time I ate without anyone to accompany me. Plus, some people are definitely looking at me (I'm not paranoid); the best reason I thought was because I was wearing all white... guess it's there first time to see a nurse eating.

Ignoring them, I picked up my PRN review book & started to chug some food down while reading... mastering the congenital heart diseases.

I could've been strolling around the mall looking for new clothes but I thought of books, so I spent my time reading this book I was planning to buy awhile ago (I'm gonna buy it tomorrow though); it was all about the serial killer who almost took away fifty women in Seattle dates 1982 (not sure) until the year 2004. I wasn't planning reading it but I really love criminology too, & I've also put to use my recently acquired psychiatric nursing-mind to diagnose this killer- Yep! Freud's anal stage. I guess his mom made an anti-social kid & was successful. Yikes!

Two o'clock & then I took off. I dozed off for about an hour & now I'm still widely awake chatting with you guys. Okay, project good-mental-heroine is now activated! Haha! I hope you had a good day too! God bless :)

Shaping in, shipping out, Allan :D

Rational Plotkai

I gotta hand it to the PRN professors; they really know how to prepare us to our future. Boo-yeah!

I know Audit class is probably designed to assess whether we're ready to take up the board exams in the near future, & it'll show how much you have learned from the subjects you had encountered from the past.

We all know that's impossible too... well, possible, but hard & time-consuming, but I'm happy how much we depend on review centers so much, though I'm not really sure if other centers do that. I'll stop judging from here. haha Well, at least our speakers also credit something (more like, SOMETHING! lol) out of their sessions- still a win-win situation.

Anyways, albeit the lack of sleep, I really had a fun, entertaining & productive day listening to developmental theories. Yes! It's a simple topic, but it's really more focused on analyzing than it was on recalling them, & I saw it more like a parenting class than any other things, which is actually good! I needed that class anyway if I'm gonna have children of my own someday.

For now, I'm gonna focus my love on Anton & Macky, my cousins... well, more like my cute little friends whom I miss so much... & aunt Gina too! I only have to wait four more months so I could hug my brothers again! Ha! :D

It was a perfect day if I might say, but of course, emo Allan struck me again last night. Well, paranoid, more than an emo. I just realized I'm wrong about the moral support thing from my old friends; I couldn't blame them because they're busy with their lives, but I've thought about aversion & how much it could destroy my character.

Long story short, I'm worried about eyes & tongues...

But all in all, I couldn't really please everyone. As long as I got my true friends, a cool deviant (lol) family & my God, I don't have anything to worry about. Besides, it's really true & definitely possible to have a heart that can love even your meanest enemies or those people whom didn't like you because of your status in life (or you just probably suck in their eyes... funny, I thought of an S-name). King David asked for a new heart (that, for me, comes with a new tongue) that do not boast nor judge someone.

Although it's still vague & too early to tell (not really, I wanted a genuine faith so bad), maybe there's still a lot of processes we need to undergo to make it through the end of that tunnel- whether we get intimated or isolated, that's just Erikson's way of saying hi!

Also have to share this photo I took last week ago when I was running some errands. I took a picture of the bridge where I was almost mobbed by those goons. Cause of the trauma, I really waited for someone to accompany me while crossing that small bridge- that was girly of me (lol), but I don't want it to happen again. Plus, there's a creepy man standing over there... yikes!

I tend to over talk... or overtype, am I? Well, I really want to make something out of my day... even though it'll bore you to death anyhow, but still, thank you especially to my Argentinean readers today. Hope you had a productive day too cause I surely did! :)

Shaping in, shipping out, BMI of 22.4! Woot :D

162nd Song- Who Are You

Who Are You

Allan Aldrinne Leyva

I see your smile in the back of my mind

Who are you?

I need to know if you really exist

Who are you?

My mind is playing tricks to me

Holding down on me

I’m not that needy still I believe

It’s you who gives me life

You who shows the light

But then again, I don’t know your name

(Chorus)

Who are you?

Why do I think of you?

Are you the one who calms my spirit in tune?

I know it’s you who can give me the peace

& the tears cause I don’t know if you live

Answer me who are you

I see your blurry face

I think that in time

I could meet you

You’re making me the man I could be

But still, who are you?

Your face I couldn’t interpret

Tell me, don’t you fret

I know someday you’ll show up to me

Please give me a chance

To know I’m not in trance

If I wake up, I just wish you are here

(Repeat Chorus)

(Instrumental)

(Repeat Chorus 2x)

Who are you?

C.H.I.L.D.- A Shaping Experience

I made this post two days ago, August 19, 2009. I kinda cried when I'm doing this, though. It's all about my duty last Monday & Tuesday. Enjoy...

If you’re reading this, maybe I was too late to apologize for not being able to update so much.

Sorry! lol. Hey everyone! Since it’s officially my first day of Midterms, I’ll have to stick to my normal post length, even though it hurts too much to finally succumb to the fact that this maybe the longest blogging break I’ve ever had this year.

It’s been eleven days since I last had internet in my house. I honestly wanted to fix the phone line so badly by myself if it means that I could be oriented in the blogosphere again, but at least exposing myself from too much reality really kicks me to homeostasis.

Speaking of balance, my fourth rotation this time was in ‘Ricky Reyes’ Foundation, & it did make me a lot worst on the first day of my duty, but much better on the second day.

This Monday, of course, I went to my duty with Ate Carla. It’s nice having a company to chat with along the way, cause the silence wasn’t getting interesting to me these past few days, now that I’m not hearing so much from the world through the internet. We arrived a little bit late but it was okay since we almost got completely lost on our way to C.H.I.L.D. or the Center for Health Improvement & Life Development located nearby SM Sta. Mesa. I was actually feeling good & positive, but I haven’t had so much preparation in me, cause somehow I broke down when I saw them.

Children whom I believed did not deserve these illnesses.

There was this ache that I couldn’t surpass when we were meeting different children, having different illness that can either strengthen their principles in life, or break them completely. I should’ve been used to seeing patients in bad conditions, but it hurt me a lot. It hurt me a lot than what they have felt over the past few days or months or years with their illness, & somehow I wanted to ease their pain by desiring to get some of their illness too.

Ate Carla knew the first normal automatic feeling when I talked to her about it; being thankful that we didn’t experience what they were going through now. She had mistaken my feelings, for it was not those feelings of being grateful, but of having to live life in a different… a lot harder than a normal kid should be living. Those things I was asking God back then seemed all pretty materialistic now, & I’ve felt guilty too for having a small suicidal intention in the past & how much they want to fight their illness off.

However, as I looked upon their faces, it wasn’t a reflection of pity or grief. It wasn’t a reflection of a difficult life or future tribulations & misconceptions. It was a reflection of hope & happiness.

I’ve been a kid more than an adult until now, & I know that, even before my superego was developed, we must face life with a smile than with anxiety & self-pity. What I have felt earlier was just a sudden jolt that creased my perfect morning, but I realized that I don’t have to stay on that feeling for so long, because when I do, then it’s impossible for me to actually get to know these wonderful angels.

I am only human. I know, but I am a nurse too. Instead of letting these children cure my sympathy for them, I should be able to give some of my strength & hope for them. Although it sucks having to live a different kind of life with obvious hardships along the way, God said it wasn’t designed for us to suffer & remorse in life. Having to live life like them was designed to actually shape them up to be better in the future. Illness was created to prove that there is so much hope, happiness & love in this world. They involuntarily shaped me up from that experience.

It’s like finally getting a job for the first time (Congratulations Celine Leonardo!), or being able to wake up after two weeks of coma (Way to go, Dustin K.). I already know life is harder than what we think, but it sure is a good way to be better as a person, just like Job who have lost everything but still remained loyal to God, or Abraham who almost sacrificed Isaac, his son, to our God who was testing his faith. I said it before, the word ‘character’ came from a Greek word meaning ‘tested in fire.’ It only proves that to be able to shape up, we must first refine ourselves whether we like it or not.

Wish me luck on my first day of Midterms today. I pray everyone would pass Sir Jed’s examination, & to other exams as well. I’m still a little bit sleepy, but it’s time to study now. More adventures this week, I promise. I have to go to PLDT too & inform about their services. God bless & take care everyone.

Shaping in, shipping out, Allan :)

Adulterous Allan?

Made this post exactly a week ago. Enjoy reading you guys! In the meantime, I have to prepare for school... was a little bit feverish yesterday but I'm pretty fine now. Anyways, enjoy the content:

‘& early in the morning he came again into the temple, & all the people came unto him; & he sat down, & taught them. & the scribes & Pharisees brought unto him a woman taken in adultery; & when they had set her in the midst, they said unto him, Teacher, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act. Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what say you? This they said, testing him that they might have to accuse him.

But Jesus stooped down, & with his finger wrote on the ground, as thought he heard them not. So when they continued asking him, he lifted himself up, & said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her. & again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground.

& they who heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: & Jesus was left alone, & the woman standing before him. When Jesus had lifted himself up, & saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those your accusers? Has no man condemned you?

She said, no man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, neither do I condemn you: go, and sin no more.’

This is gonna sound (or look, I.d.k.) so bogus, but I was like the woman who created adultery on that story… okay not really, but somehow it did happen to me not so long ago, minus the gender role & an experience in love making. When I think about it now though, it seems like Jesus loves me that much.

Common response when I first thought about it- what the heck? How could someone who was a Christian who only had faith in Jesus but does not practice Christianity at all for a very long time became so lovable by our Heavenly Father?

Last night when I’ve read this verse again, I had an epiphany; that woman, who was seen committing adultery by the Pharisees, who became the talk of the temple & who made an offense equal to being casted with stones, was forgiven by Jesus Christ with no condemnation at all.

After that, waves & waves of memories went back leading me into the most specific part of it- the time when I was accused for posting something in YouTube that did not just ruin my reputation, but the entire school as well. The worst part about the incident was like being in that temple, scared to be casted with stones while everyone looks at you like a criminal.

Not only that, back then I was so hopeless that I even questioned God. “I was happy, Lord, why did these mayhems, which could’ve fallen into someone more evil than me, specifically chose me from 8 billion people in this world?” Turns out I wasn’t really happy at all.

From my former school, I was like involuntarily pulled & placed in some random section in my last year of college in Arellano University. My response- how did I deserve this crappy second chance anyway? I mean, I was happy; I had a lot of friends… best friends even, had extra money from my business, had a lot of people looking up to me & a lot of things that only I can do. & all that were completely taken away from me.

I was sinking in this pit where no one could even possibly see me & pull me out. There was a point in time when I even thought about suicidal intentions. That was normal, I guess. After all, it’s more scary when I go jumping up & down merrily because of the fact that I’m falling apart. I prayed & clung to God & developed a sudden faith that only appears during crises, & then drifts away when things turned out good. & even if I did all that, he was the one who pulled me out that hole.

& there I was, getting ready to be stoned. Throughout my nineteen years of existence in this world I was a Christian, but there was never a day or even a couple of hours in those nineteen years that I really acknowledge him & let him enter my heart. I just believe that there was a God, but then again, even demons believe in God.

Then one day I woke up early in the morning, & saw myself: my true form, which was far more than an atheist & a demon combined- a non-practicing Christian. & I stayed to that form for more than I could ever think of. I didn’t see that coming though… all that bad experiences were actually God’s plan for me to be a better person in the end.

He saw me as an adulterous woman just like in the story, but then He didn’t judge me, nor condemn me, nor have forsaken me. When I got lost in my path, he was actually beside me to pull his flashlight out to clear my path; When they have ruined my clothes of dignity, leaving me naked, he did not laugh at me nor tell me ‘I told you so’. He even clothed me with the finest robes only a king can wear. & he even said he loves me that much… so much that I couldn’t even deserved in a lifetime. He was beside me all along, & I ignored him.

God loves me so much that he didn’t send me in some random section in what I first thought was a crappy school (I actually believe I could pass the board exams now, unlike before). He loves me so much that he even put me in a class full of Christian friends along with my old classmate John who became my tour guide in my first week of class. God loves me so much that he specifically put me to Sir Jed’s class who not only became my favorite teacher, but the one who really showed me the way to Jesus Christ. God loves me so much that he didn’t wait for me to come back & apologize to him (even though it’s unforgivable if it was me), He was the one who even came to look for me… the mighty King of kings, the Savior, the biggest of all the biggest things, searched through the dark & twisty roads just to save a mere servant who doesn’t even deserve to live in the first place. He saved me out of all the miseries & burden I’ve caused him.

While they see me as a person who committed a crime big enough for me to be forgiven, He protected me from condemnation & told them “those who wanted to condemn my son Allan, they shall admit that they do not commit any sins whatsoever, for a sin is still a sin no matter how big or small it is.”

God bless & take care everyone! The script, by the way, is found in the book of John 8:2-11. *Chants ‘I do not boast & I do not have to. I just testified His love before you.’

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D

We Are 2 Years Old!!!

After almost ten days of absence, me & my DSL have finally met again! Woot! & today, I'm celebrating one heck of a birthday! Yipee!

I just want to give my appreciation to those who have been visiting my blog every now & then. It really means a lot & it wouldn't be called a blog (you know, public journal of some sort?) without all of you who sacrificed your time just to comprehend this blogger! :P

If you were with this blog two years ago, you might've seen some big changes & melodramatic dramas I've had. LJ became my own personal sanctuary, & honestly, I didn't expect ending up having to continue my own little adventures in text. I didn't' expect having a blog to define me too.

Before I put up my first blog post exactly two years ago, I was just a mere second year college student in GCIC. I was (how do you say this) a little bit off on the positive side of life. I was like bipolar in nature; one moment I was happy then so much devastated on the next. I did have my ups & downs here, huh?

I never thought that Friendster would make me one of their featured bloggers for this year, too... not really though. I just love the recognition it has given me. One of the recognition I did not like though- my controversial Youtube video. I really had a hard time moving on before & after that incident, but I really learned my lesson. LJ also made the newspapers (of course I'm exaggerating) when it comes to the networking business, which I kinda cooled down a bit when I was forced to make an unnecessary exit from my former school.

People weren't that much enthusiastic about Lefty's Journal- I can't blame them really, because I didn't really plan on having a blog in the first place. I don't even know how I gained so much energy to make this huge enough for Friendster, Yahoo & Google to show up in their search pages. One day I just typed 'lefty's journal' in yahoo then LJ would show up. I also typed my name only to find out I was part of an online site called 'Zoom Info Business People Information'. & to think I was being emotional to my posts before! (Crooked smile)



All in all, we have survived another year full of real entertainment- drama or no drama. On April, I mentioned about having to shape up to a better me & everyone has my word on it. I guess I became successful, huh? I did shape myself up because I needed & wanted to.

But you know what, Lefty's Journal was actually the one who shaped me up for good & I thank my Lord for giving me this constant balance in life. I really have to give my kudos to myself & to you guys as well. It wasn't just LJ who turned two years old today, not just me, but everyone of us.

I'm gonna be posting a lot more stories about MTNB & Tn'T, more compositions I've written over the last few weeks, & some of the testimonials & posts I've made during my absence. I think it would compensate all my transgressions to everyone of you. Thank you & have a good night!

Oh yeah, here's the piece of cake you've been waiting for... lol. Happy Birthday to everyone of us... happy birthday Lefty's Journal!

Cheers for the future years, Aldrinne :D

Trifles & Tribulation II- Conquering Korea

August 8, 2013- "After the long wait, the sequel of the original 'MTNB-like' film Trifles & Tribulation is now in production," Allan Leyva said yesterday on his official Twitter account.

As you may all know, the movie was technically Allan's first appearance in the film industry. Though it received so many speculations about the Platinum Prince's ongoing feud with the director of the movie (because it was reported that Leyva was prioritizing Meet the Newest Beatles back then than Tn'T), the staff said the controversy was not true.

"When I first heard that news last year when we were so busy making MTNB, I seriously just laughed it off because the news wasn't true & I have no idea where'd that came from. But my Tn'T family was so great & supportive in MTNB & I'm really happy I get to make a sequel." Allan Leyva said in a statement.

Trifles & Tribulation was shown on October 2010, the same year he was known as a popular artist. The movie was all about a commoner named Polo being discovered by accident- when a music producer heard his singing in the showers. He agreed to become a singer, but is faced with a lot of challenges than just conquering his fear on stage like being known by people.

Now Polo (Leyva) is set to face another wave of trifles & tribulation, with the goal of being known by Korea. "I think the second installment of Tn'T will focus on how much Polo will try to not become a failed talent by his manager. I also remember those moments when I was also starting in my career." He added, "...but I'm guessing this movie will also show how much Polo has grown from this shy singer into a strong & appreciative one."

The production is said to start next month, September 2013. For more hollywood news, visit www.Eportal.com

Efron & Pattinson Aren't Staying?

August 9, 2013- Because of the online leakage of the sequel of the movie Meet The Newest Beatles (MTNB Encore) that received so much controversy this week, Warner Brothers finally released their official statement to this ongoing issue.

Warner Brothers told E! News last night, "We are deeply devastated to the accident about the leakage that happened this month. We have been very careful to our belongings & that we cannot believe that a fan will pull a stunt like this after we have decided to open the studio for the fans to visit."

"... these news are not new to us, but it is our negligence to approved a studio tour for the supporters. We are now temporarily closing all the studio visits & will double our security. We're also taking appropriate actions now to those who were involved in the accident."

On August 3, 2013, a blogger posted something about taking a full copy of a script of the film, days after he got it from a studio tour. He eventually sold it to a company & was accused of stealing private property.

MTNB Encore cast & crew showed their rage to the people who instigated the plans. "It was hard work that they've stolen from us, not just a copy of a script." the director of MTNB said in a statement.

Because of that, it was predicted from the script that the two bachelors who recently joined the MTNB boat, Efron & Pattinson, will not be staying until the end of the movie series.

The six gentlemen were quiet about it, though. However, some says that the news are not true & that the allegations did not come from the MTNB itself, but from fake stories that are encircling the hollywood now.

Allan Leyva, who plays one of the original MTNB four also expressed his thoughts about the gossips. "The whole cast & staff still did not make any stories or scripts regarding the third part of the movie. We have been so intrigued by the controversial online leakage so please, we are asking for your cooperation to help us stop spreading false rumors for we still don't know what will happen to us in the story." said by the Platinum Prince in a statement. For more hollywood insider news, log on to www.Eportal.com.

MTNB Encore Story Leakage

August 3, 2013- Although the cast of MTNB are not doing much promoting on the sequel of the famous blockbuster movie last year, a blogger was being sued for illegally transpiring the film's story online.

A 27-year old man from Detroit, who owns a site called "Know the Newest Beatles Encore" was charged for stealing when he posted about exact story & the characters' lines of the second part of the movie last Thursday.

He stated in his post- "I went to the MTNB studio & got a copy the sequel's story... which of course they didn't know I got. At least I got the souvenir that I wanted! lol."

The Warner Brothers took action right after the blog was discovered. It was reported that the blogger earned five hundred thousand dollars by selling it to a company. He visited the MTNB studio on July  25, 2013 & apparently stole a script of the movie. The authorities said it already leaked on different blogs & websites. The cast & the crew did not believe it at first, but they believed right after they checked the original copy.

Allan Leyva, who's currently busy shooting Trigger & recording for his new album, stated in his blog that he was appalled when he received the bad news.

"I remember this guy- he is such a big fan of the movie & he really was a nice man. I didn't know he'd pull such a stunt like that, but I hope this incident shall pass. The best solution that I could think of about this problem is preventing future instances like this one. At least, the film itself wasn't stolen so albeit the story leakage, I guess the fans will still be excited..."

The other cast of MTNB too was affected by the online leakage. David Archuleta who plays Andrew Tennessee, tweeted "was shocked when I heard the news. I think we weren't careful enough, but I assure you it's still different when you see the film."

This week, Zac Efron, who recently joined the MTNB cast, said in a statement "...MTNB was devastated & furious about the hard work we have done to provide everyone the best. It's just so sad people don't care enough about the consequences."

Daniel Radcliffe who was also busy filming a new movie that will hit the theaters next year, also expressed his rage towards the people who got the script online. "I hate it when people get nosy & try to flunk the film. You wouldn't understand, cause you're not the one who sacrificed everything for that movie." stated in his blog.

Warner Brothers studio still haven't released an official statement about the this news. For more hollywood insider news, log on to www.Eportal.com.

Day-offs & Dusel

I finally got the day off I've been waiting, & it's a Sunday!

Just wanted to update you guys. I've been doing some MTNB plus Tn'T stories just to bring life to 'Life or Something Like it' stories again. I really miss doing posts like that- it just makes me so excited of the future, though I still have prospectophobia lol.

Anyways, the week was full of drama & adventures... misadventures actually. I kinda had some new experiences & got stuck in the usual problems. That's why I needed the change. I also reconnected with someone so important in my life & met a couple of friends too on the way. Although I'm going through some rough patches right now, I still am thankful for the way it's treating me.

I also need your feedback if you're loving my music right now. It's actually surprising how fast that player can start; when I was using imeem here in Safari, my imeem player will wait for me to scroll down to its section on my blog just to listen to it. Mt mixpod's way cooler though, for me.

I just want to say thank you too for those who offered some prayers for Dustin/Dusel. I got some good news- he awoke some couple of hours ago but he was still confused. At least he got through everything, right? Prayers really do come true, right? Jesus really does heal & protects.

Okay, so I think I'm gonna make those posts pending reviews for now until I could find a perfect day where I could post my pics. God bless, take care & have a blessed Sunday morning!

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :)

Steppingstone... Not Tombstone

"Thank you Lord for all the problems, tribulation, & those bad situations we've been into lately!"

I'm not really being a hypocrite at all. Last night I realized I've been so trapped in my problems that I needed some air, & eventually God listened to my prayers again & helped me to stand stronger amidst the destructive waves I'm encountering.

Why is it we don't usually become problem-free? Why is it that from 8 billion people in this world, you were chosen to handle that specific problem? Why is there any problem anyway?

Problems aren't just randomly selecting you, it's not because of karma either. They are more likely genetically designed just for you, not to create burden in your lives, but to mold you into the character you have to be in the future.

How did Cory Aquino became president? She felt she's more suitable as a wife & a mother than a leader, but because she lost her husband she didn't just mourn or blame God for it, she stood up for the Filipinos, for freedom & for our rights. Because of those problems, we are shaped up to be the best children & followers of God & Jesus Christ.

There was a story about a blacksmith & his silver; he was melting the silver when he was asked by someone. 'How would you know when to stop melting the silver?' The blacksmith answered, 'You'll know when to stop melting the silver when you see you're reflection on the melted silver.'

Character actually means 'tested in fire' in greek. To become the person we have to be, then we must face the intense refinery like a silver. Problems are what shapes us to become more like Jesus. Problems produces perseverance that you can use to win from tribulation in the future, & to be the exact soldiers God wanted us to become, & when you look at that silver metal, you will see not just your reflection, but Jesus' also.

Oh yeah, if you're asking me 'what about those non-believers?' Yes, they are shaped up by their problems too, but you know what, the difference between the two of us are that we have hope & know that we have someone we can lean on. Simple at that.

So if you're in the midst of problems or 'emo' moments right now, don't think it's a curse or a case of bad luck, it's there to mold & haul you to become the person you have to be. Problems are not a tomb stone... they are actually a steppingstone.

I'm signing off now. I still have to prepare for school & I'm gonna be so late lol. God bless, take care, & have a nice & productive day.

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D

Optimistic Pessimism

We have to be messed up, to step up.

I remember that line from an episode of Grey's Anatomy & it's just very meaningful to me today. It seems like blasphemy for second chances are not given immediately just like that, but I guess you just have to put your faith into it, so that at the end of the day, being lost means something.

Good morning everyone. I don't know why I woke up so early, but I guess I'll be having a long day today, hence the body clock. Maybe it's my problems that woke me up, cause a few more hours then I have to face the music again.

It's like judgment day all over again. Let's just say that I only have until tomorrow to come up with something, but it's hard, to be stuck in a pedestal where the one who promised you greatly ignores you from the one who you promised something. It's complicated, I guess, if I have to explain them.

However, true feelings are the ones who you cannot really express, not because it's hard... but because it's too plenty- all thoughts are coming into you that you can't focus on a single one. I think it's just God who's throwing stones at me or it is God's will to test me how strong my faith is. All in all, if I have to go through all these just because of my love to God, then so be it.

I'm scared, actually, because I don't know who to talk to nor to ask help, & I know God will help me but I pray that this will be over. God loves us so much that He doesn't want to give us what we cannot handle.

It's only a matter of time, that I have to face the consequences. Sooner of later all will wither & die, but I guess this will trigger myself to grow again through time. For now, I just have to close my eyes & pray.

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne

161st Song- Schizophrenic Girl (Feat. Lady Gaga)

I'm really enjoying this song... gotta think of some dance moves though lol. Anyways, here's a duet with Lady Gaga herself! I simply love that girl- unique & trendy... just like me. & now I shall call myself... Manly Gaga! lol

Schizophrenic Girl

Allan Aldrinne Leyva

First you got to learn to let them go

Entering your body, you can act in my show

First you got to rate them

Strings attached, sedate them

Let ‘em learn that everything is not in their signal

Go! If you really wanna know

Can this girl put up a show?

You never needed to worry ‘bout

A lady gaga move

If it’s giving you the thrills

Baby you give me the chills

Feeling like an entertainer

(Chorus)

First you gotta love her

Then you really have to understand her

(Schizophrenic) girl, schizophrenic girl

(Repeat)

She’s a poker face kind of nasty girl

Join me in her club, maybe she would propose

In her leather or whatever, feathered clothes

This will be the age of Madonna’s girl

First you should assess them

Rage, is what she’s saying

Then in front of Ellen

She would act like inocente

Gagaga go! If she’s giving me her lips

I would tell you I got this

Sip a little alcohol

Then make an angel face for sure

Holding in & holding tight

See me as she changes you

In the lighting of her howl

I just needed time with her

(Repeat Chorus 2x)

(Techno Instrumental)

Minnie mouse ears, I collect a plenty

Gaga is her name, & she’s schizophrenic

I would never mind dating a girl like her

I can’t just pretend when she’s acting like swirl

(Repeat Chorus 3x)

First you gotta love her

But then you have to understand her

First you gotta love her

But then you have to understand her

Schizophrenic girl

Lesson on Losing

I did not see that coming. Today was totally different & unexpected, but somehow I learned from all of it.

I couldn't say it was a regular day for me, but I'll intend to deliver like it's normal anyway. I just need some time out sessions from everything right now, & it seems I'm all spaced out that past tribulation were coming back all at the same time.

I lost a friend today; she was actually one of my best friends before but the way our fate flowed destroyed all of everything we have created. I've also lost a lot of respect; I was so surreal, ambivalent & nonchalant about my world that it broke down again. I know I haven't been creating my own problems, but it seems like all those things I have done in the past were all getting back at me now.

My life hasn't been normal until I moved to a newer & safe atmosphere. Though I've been living a not-so-quiet life (or a life with a whole new views), I've still been vindicated with the consequences I did not really escape from, but I just set aside. Now, the time has come for me to harvest all that needed to be harvested. I just don't know how to find the solution.

Maybe this time I have to inculcate all my lessons. If it's not important before, then I need to set its volume to its possible highest frequency. It's time to say goodbye to those who doesn't want to stay, & time to open up a new door again. This transition phase did affect me a lot, & now I'm going back to sleep.

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne

ABCD

Allanned!

If you've been attempting to view my alternative blog 'Allanned!' today, I'm gonna break the ice here- I've deleted that blog. Just kidding.

It's actually going on a major overhaul. It seems like my Blogger account haven't been receiving much attention from me & the readers. I'm not updating it like what I'm doing here in Lefty's Journal everyday. It's kinda sad knowing that it's not receiving so much uniques like that of Lefty's, but I'm happy that somehow it attracts many international visitors before.

Just to let you guys know, Allanned! will be restarting its systems to bring more 'serenity + simplicity' to all you readers out there. For now, I'll be recommending my original blog for you guys to see.

Bye Cory

"How do i find the words to say goodbye?" Kris Aquino asked her mother who was laid to rest forever, to be reunited with her late husband & finally become one with the angels above.

I was crying awhile ago. It must've been a very sad day for all of us, even though there are no classes... if Cory's death will be the reason for a holiday, then I'd rather go to school just to save her.

But she didn't say goodbye for good actually. She wanted us to know that there are no goodbyes in this world, it's more likely a 'see you later' kind of goodbye. But for now, I just wanna say- thank you & goodbye Tita Cory. You will be missed by the whole world."

Dustin/Dusel

Dustin or known as Dusel in his Twitter, is a sixteen year old boy who I was following since Gabe Bondoc recommended his account to us. He actually inspires me from day one until today. However, I really am a fan of his drawing & art.

He was actually the boy who was fighting from his very ill heart condition months ago. He didn't really deserve it though, but this is life, & I look up to him because he's not moping around like other ill people, he has always been looking on the positive side of life, that everything has a purpose.

Sometime around June or July, he received a new heart from a 24-year old man. He thanked him for it & was then operated immediately. It was a successful surgery regarding heart transplantation, but now, because of the increased pressure his body received from all the surgeries he had, he faced another challenge- a benign tumor on his brain.

It was still a risky surgery, but he faced it again. I remember it will be his 33rd surgery on his 444th day in the hospital. Now, twelve days later, he was still in the state of coma. His mom is actually the one who's doing all the tweeting, & we're actually praying for good news.

I'm really expecting some good news today. Please offer him a prayer, even just for a minute of two.

I'll be doing some paper works & studying today. I woke up so early & decided to take a nap awhile ago. I'm gonna talk to all of you later. God bless & have a nice day everyone.

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D

Life & Death

From what I've seen awhile ago, it really made me cry seeing a beloved lady passed away & I thought to myself 'what more if she was your mother?'

Although I understand their grief, for I lost a grandfather a couple of years ago during my first year as a college student. He suffered from Diabetes Mellitus too much, & seeing him how he couldn't notice me from my uncle Glenn's house did hurt me so much, not because he couldn't recognize me, but how much he had fought until the last years of his life, that I can't seem to ease his burden.

Even though death have always been associated with the end of a person's life, it is not what we always imagined. Death isn't cruel but is actually kind, it does not show us the end but rather the beginning, it does fades from our hearts but represents the true form of life. We may be afflicted with sadness & devastation, but in the end we must still celebrate the first part of our journey. Death is actually the way we are all going through right now.

But once you see the best things in life, death becomes a worry wart. Even if not all things are permanent in this world, life still makes us experience hardships & good times so that we could strengthen our hearts to follow God. That is the most definite purpose of life in this world.

For we should not mourn for death because it is given & that we should mourn during our livable moments. But then again, we should not always mourn for life, & that we should celebrate both with death.

Happy birthday to my little sister, Aubry Ruchelle Leyva who turned eleven today. She's all grown up now & I must set her some rules when it comes to boys now lol. Time surely flies :P

God bless, take care & have a happy & good morning. Celebrate life & the afterlife at the same time.

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D

Cory waves...

August 3, 2009. Third day after she ascended to Heaven.

Life is a meaningful gesture that arises from what we say, sing, dance, or do. It derails almost all the hatred, deception & failure so that happiness & contentment constantly flow through our hearts.

It symbolizes eternal glory, as it goes through the hardships of the broken world; It paves way for love to be real than surreal; it is the primary abstract microcellular unit that gives energy for the heart to involuntarily contract; it comprises the neurons for the brain to work & depends on God Himself.

Corazon Aquino was the life of the Philippines. From her reign, she did not speak of blasphemy nor pull an offensive activity. Until her last breath of life, she reunited not only the Filipinos, but the whole world too. Until her last breath of life, she made the sky cry & the wind chant. Until her last breath, she made sure she had lived a peaceful & courageous life for us to look upon.

As the trumpets, prayers, & sadness fade away from her soul, all she was hearing now was the chants of the angels, the sound of the gate being opened as the path goes narrower every second she steps into the dark, the sound of a calming voice so majestic even the biggest of the biggest of all the universe hides itself for His power & glory.

She is now in Heaven... with our Father... at last. Below the Heavens, as she viewed her country that brightly mourns (for she only see black & yellow), she raised her hand & waved to us, not to say goodbye... but to say "see you later." She signaled a group of roaring thunders with the bright augments of sun rays. She then closed her eyes, stood up from where she was looking, & began dancing & singing as God hugs her.

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :)

Audit Midterms

I guess I have to lived with the fact that I can't & couldn't watch Lady Gaga on the 11th of August... but I'm still crossing my fingers for the bucks & the time. Arghh! :P

Anyways, good morning everyone! I woke up at exactly twelve in the morning so I could update you guys... & guess what?! I really had an amazing day yesterday, despite the two tests we took, but the long test plus the Midterms are actually the reasons why I had a beautiful day on the first place.

I didn't really intend to pass both exams. I only planned to pass the long examination & maybe earn half of the Midterm exam to settle for an average grade. I didn't study at all, so perhaps I ended up instigating that plan.

Before I went to school though, I've read Sir Jed's Facebook status & it really made my day. Based on my understanding, it talked about how we should pray for the Lord to give us wisdom & determination, & there was even a verse to complement it (I think it was James 1:5). Although I didn't study due to S.A.D. (seasonal affective disorder! lol kidding), I still carried a whole lot of faith & believed in our Father- that He can truly make something possible with a snap of His fingers.

So there we were, answering the long exam. Honestly, it was hard than what I thought it'll be. I wasn't ready for diagnostic examinations.. let alone Pharmacology!!! which is actually my weakness when it comes to all the subjects. My mom actually did a great job, getting a 62/100, since the passing score was 60. You know what, even though I'm unsure to almost all of my answers, I still got the boundary score & it really made me happy. That's because I get to spend time talking to Jesus before I started the long test, so I stopped being serious there.

During lunch, I thought about how big the percentage the Midterm examination alone has & I asked myself, what if I didn't pass Midterm because I failed the Midterm exams? I know I had a fair grade in my quizzes & in my long test, but what if I still fail? Back then I realized how much I should pass the Midterm exams too.

However, I still didn't study because of the fact that I hate cramming- it could really result to a mental block when answering a test. Because of that, I just took a little nap while waiting for the exams, really prayed hard to God to give us the knowledge we needed & hope for the better.

That was the hardest exam I really encountered throughout my life so far... next to UPCAT though. Seriously, the questions are so basic that you couldn't even find the right answer. I know that in a multiple choice kind of exam, situational questions can give you a bigger chance to get the correct  answer. On what I previously took, it was both situational & analytical.. I couldn't really explain it but it was really hard. Even GCIC can't possibly torture us that much. BUT before I took the exams & after I scanned some of the questions that made my eyes dilate for a moment (lol), I just took a little conversation with God, & told Him I'm really apt to anything He wanted me to have. Even though I wasn't ready for the battle, I took the examination.

So now I know why I'm having this scapular pain... a little part about my sleeping posture contributes to it, but now I know the main reason of why I have it- it's actually the one that signals that the test is really hard. That was a funny reason, but it's true. After UPCAT examination, I got a fever though instead of the pain... so I kinda knew my body's mechanism now when faced with a difficult exam.

To cut the story short, despite the pain I had during the exams & how drowsy I was to concentrate, I still passed the Midterm exams... with a grade of 68/100, my best so far.

I'm not expecting a grade like that though, but you know what, God really wanted me to pass as if I deserve it. God & His unconditional love to all of us really strengthen your ability to almost everything, so you can achieve your goal. Some people say 'the best way to predict the future is to create it.' But you know what, I say 'the best way to predict the future is to create it, to start praying to God, & to be humble to everything.'

Although I was kinda devastated again cause not everyone passed the examination (that made me feel really sad), I still am thankful to God so much. When I think about it, He was likely more the one who answered the exam while I was the one who fell asleep & experienced the scapular pain.

God loves us so much that He gave His only begotten son that whosoever believe in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life- John 3:16

I really have to get back to sleep now. I finished packing all my stuff for my duty in Manalo Lying-in in the city of shoes so add me to your prayers that I could wake up early & still inculcate everything what an OB nurse can do. It's been a long time since I was assigned to a DR again. Condolence to the family Aquino but I'm actually happy that Tita Cory did live a good... a great life. She will be missed by the whole world. Hope you had a great & fruitful day too. God bless, take care, & have a productive week guys!

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D

160th Song- All Of You

This song really suits how strong Madame Cory's bond with our God. This is actually my first official gospel song that I have written two weeks & three days before she passed away. Funny thing is, I think this song was perfectly scheduled to be posted during this National Mourning Period for our late president. Anyways, I really am thankful that I've finally found the serenity & strength to write something for our Lord. :)

All Of You

Allan Aldrinne Leyva

Today, I confess my sins

I’ve been lying, & stealing, & hating

I could not believe myself

Lead me Lord to you

Let me praise you Lord

In this simple song

(Chorus)

Clear my path

Wash my soul

Mold me into something more

Who will know what’s right or wrong

& maybe you could be my all

Today, I’ve been spreading my wings

If the Heaven is pulling me up in the sky

I would give up for you

Lead me Lord to you

Bless those who have shared

What His love’s is all about?

(Repeat Chorus)

& if I try to see you’re face

I would kneel with sudden grace

& thus your love’s limitless

I could drown saying your name

If the end is still obscure

You gave me strength to carry on

(Repeat Chorus 2x)

If the verge is coming near

You would always let me fear

So I could face a better day

Stepping on the path you’ve made

All of you, my God

(Repeat Chorus)

My Savior, my Emmanuel

My everything, my king who will stop me from what I’m doing

My Alpha, Omega

Lord, you are my everything

The Real Wonder Woman

She was ultimately the symbol for democracy, justice, hope, power, the nation, the people & freedom. The first filipino female president, has found sanctuary today, August 1, 2009 at 3:18 in the morning. *Wipes tears

I may not have witnessed how she fought for our freedom years ago, but I still see her as a vision of the Philippine's refined legislature to make our nation a better one, a greater one. For she stood not to empower us, but to serve us.

I may not have remembered the years she was encrypted with sorrows from her husband's death, & how her world must've given up already, but I still see her as the woman who stood up amidst the storms, as the woman who prays, as the woman who made amends rather than anguished those who trespassed her, & as the woman who dealt not only with the problems of the people, but with her sickness as well.

She wasn't ordinary in my eyes; she's like a saint that do not judge nor do not segregate people based on the wealth they have. She admitted she's not good enough to be president. It turned out, based on the nation, she was one of the best presidents who ever lived. For she was not alleged, but was elected. As she nurtured her children, she even nurtured the Filipinos, to fight for our rights & to keep a positive outlook in life.

We may not be related by blood, but she gave birth to the rise of a serene & well-oriented government. For she did not pass away... but lives. She was the real wonder woman who represented the past, the present & the future of our people. She was Maria Corazon "Cory" Cojuangco Aquino. Thank you Cory, may you rest in peace. :)