Although my days are not quite a happy one right now, I'm just so overwhelemed & overjoyed that this was a great journey to walk on with you readers. Though bad news surely suprised me like losing the campaign for instance, it's still good that I get to lose nothing from this & learn something from it. If I'm saying that not all the people who support our campaign didn't have the chance to vote for us, it'll be like a mediocre excuse from losing. It's their loss anyway, right? I just hope they can make the school better by being the "voice of the people". Anyways, congratulations are fit for the arrangement.
Okay, I think I wanna share the first post I have ever written. It's kinda like a letter from someone. I made it, like two years ago. It's called A Funny Letter made by yours truly. It's kinda crazy to start my blog from this post:
"Funny how life gives you something good, then takes it all away. That we have to be substitutes of someone to feel good, not knowing that we just fulfill someone's time & waste our's. How our eyes met at a constant distance & you don't care one thing about it. How strong we can be together, & weak if it gets longer. How bearable to say I love you & how hard it can be. How I keep wondering the long & hard journey to find a replica of you thinking that I might hurt you even when I'm hurting myself. How long my body stays longer, & my heart isn't. How I think it's almost over, but truly it's just the start. How low a man can be chasing over somebody who is not for him. How loving is so easy, but hard to be loved. How today feels like yesterday. How lucky I am to meet you & unlucky I am to lose you. How there's so much I wanted to tell you, but there's so little time. MUCH have been said, & now I'm losing control & you are the only one who can change me back, with you as me & me as you. I gave the best I could, but I guess it's not enough for you. I longed for someone who will make me perfect (Even though perfection is next to social suicide), but chances are I'll end up losing everybody that surrounds me. The feeling kept me awake & very strong, but the reality made me weak, so weak than I could ever imagine. I become a stray, & it wasn't my intention to disturb you, I just hope that we can somehow, in an alternate universe, be more than friends, cause when I'm seeing you with somebody, it really impairs. I've got to set my priorities, but how can I ever straighten it when I have no chance to reconcile with you? No chance I presumed. I just hope for a day when you'll come to my door, not expecting you to say you'll try to love me. Funny how this message came from a human like me, who never wants anything but you. Funny how I seemed to lose hope to have you. Funny how this ends, very funny & at the same time, very sad..."
It's sad, right? Well, I got over it years ago, so nothing to fear. I'm not being emotional right now. :)
As arranged, here's the best words I have ever said in this blog of mine from the start of my 50th post until the 99th. You might be able to remember it, so enjoy!
1. Whoa! I really missed posting here. It's been two days since I wrote something, & now look what I'm doing now; re-writing my notes in Nutrition & Microbiolgy & Parasitology at 2:35am.
2. It's been so fast that I cannot believe I'm studying & stressing again (Then again, when did I became a stressed-free person).
3. I'm sooo overwhelmed in my schedule since Monday to Saturday, my classes starts at 8 in the morning & ends in 6 in the evening, with only an hour break. Talk about serious torture!
4. But sleep nowadays, must be a thing of the past right now. In nursing, you are either awake or just resting... so... zzzzz...
5. Whoa! To close my eyes means putting all my responsibility aside, so back to being a coffeeholic.
6. From 8am to 6pm?! Even call center agents can't handle our schedule...
7. It's really not a joke when my mom said that NCM100 & Microbiology is hard, so now, I just don't listen to my 'mom facts' anymore because she's always right when it comes to something that is hard to do. Oh how days can turn into weeks...
8. Kissing up was way centuries ago. The newest trend, I guess, was being the best in class... not really the best, but being one of the best.
9. I'm still me, so don't you worry. :)
10. In life right now, I think I need some shortcuts & fast forwards!
11. I know it's true that you should work hard on something so that you could be twice happier when you finished something cause you know you worked hard for it, but shish! Does it really gonna suck your soul in working hard?
12. What's the use of complaining anyway, right? It's not like it's going to rain this morning so they could cancel class, right?... Wait a minute... (Lord, please help us make the sun go away for a moment) :)
13. I know it's very fun to study summer classes, but at the end of the day, you'd be so tired that you wished you'd rather spend the vacation on the beach, or in any nurses' case... in bed.
14. Another day to be tortured... the worst part is, I think it's fun... sob.
15. This is the moment that my heart is telling me to do it. I am ready to fall... literally.
16. At first I always said that summer school is hard but fun. Now, it's another way around, making it seem more negative than what I thought it was.
17. Solutions like editing your pictures & stuff like than make me feel serene just for awhile. It's a good thing for me to show my creativity that I started to love back when I was a child, & it gives me the rest that I needed to continue working hard... I mean studying hard. You see! I can't even distinguish studying from working anymore. It's as if I'm doing both, with no salary. sob
18. I'm a mess today, no! I'm not giving up with these burdens that can ruin me because I'm not a mediocre when it comes to handling superficial & all-what-you-can-think-of pain. I am my Alaxan, I am my Neozep, I am my Pizza Hut.
19. Good evening everyone! What a day I had today. Obviously, it's gonna be about school-school-school again, but what can I do? I'm there at 8 in the morning to six in the evening, is there anything to talk about besides... microbiology?
20. Jeah who always shows that she cares even though she acts like she's not, Achi Aileen who never failed to make me feel I have my older sibling with me, Icey who's always there to make me feel high-spirited in finishing everything, Ian who, day by day, make me laugh, Ronnie whom I always tease with someone (Yihee!), Reggie who makes everything so funny, Dalal who always there to... laugh (lol), Sheila who is... very quiet, Mafe whom I link with... my lips are sealed lol, & some of my new friends there in N-313.
21. There will come a time where everything will be better, where you could be who you really want to be. A time where courage is finally strengthened, & fears are a thing of the past. A time where people will look up on you & will tell you how much have you been change for the better. A time where faith met fate, & strive met thrive. If you open your eyes, you're already there, happy & contented, to a place where you really wanted to be.
22. That's the best thing about life. You know that there will always be happy endings to where you are heading to.
23. I'll take myself to the lowest part of my life, not only so I could experience it, but to hurt myself in the process so I could be wiser. In any battlefield, I'll be collecting these emotional scars. I won't let myself be numb, for I want to be hurt. In the end, I could prove to myself... "I lived a life"
24. All will wither & good things will bloom. All will break & good things will soon be repaired. All will go down & good things will fly.
25. Faith & Fate Album Tour
26. It's been a 'long & winding road' for everyone of us, but it's freaking good that we finished another week of summer school with or without those emotional breakdowns that appear from time to time
27. Though life now is way different from that of before, I guess happiness & serenity always stayed within me. Even though frustations & sudden drama affects these emotional platelets, well let's just say there were emotional white blood cells too.
28. We all had dreams that never failed to make those brain cells work inside these little ol' head of ours. Dreams that brightened our day or turned on that mood swings. Dreams that will let you define whether something is real or not, & even if it is fantasy, you still want to believe it's there or happening...
29. It's so weird even for me, but the thing is, it's actually kind of devastating to dream something or someone that you really love, & when you wake up without them, you just keep pretending that they're with you until you realized that you only hurt yourself in the process, making you nocturnal & nostalgic.
30. I'm becoming the bad guy in my own show.
31. Can't they imagine we're being dragged around from 8am to 6pm with 2 hours of going home & still be opt for going to school the next morning? Can't they at least think that we're only sleeping for less than 5 hours & give us only one day to study two major exams? Can't they imagine that this day that the school gave us is only for us to rest more? Can't they realized that we're studying 500 pages of Nutrition, NCM 100 & Microbiology for only a day? Geez, what the hell is happening to them?
32. May. Midterms. Mayhems.
33. 77 Songs!!! I'm on an emotional-music roll, & though my days are making me a complete mess, I guess every bit of my feelings put in those songs are all worth it, I think it comes with the new hair. :D
34. Anyways, I think I had enough rest for today... Rest, not sleep. The word 'sleep' doesn't exists in the nurses' dictionary anymore. It's just the way it is.
35. Since I'm a Cap-rius, meaning a Capricorn & Aquarius, I've been appreciating horoscopes lately, I guess it's because it kinda gives you advice on how you deal life today. It's quite witty, being updated everyday & not running out of ideas & advices, so I'm giving them a thumbs up. Thank you Mr. Friendster. :)
36. Life...
37. All I know is I saw daylight again! hehe
38. At least I get to spend time with my pillow before I go back with my school bag.
39. The Hills Have ICE!!!
40. I'm a little needy, but isn't it a super-duper cliche? We all are needy people & we need to need something to need to work to get it , & at the end of the day, you just need to rest.
41. There will come a time when people will stand up & have their kingdom on their own... now's my time. lol
42. From the rising fame of the two David's in American Idol to the fall of China because of the earthquake, there's still me who exists to continue the path that I God & I have planned to take.
43. Guess who's running for secretary in the student council? I could've imagine David Archuleta being my assistant secretary, but I guess he's just too busy going for the gold in today's finals of American Idol Season 7.
44. I guess I'll be writing more songs that's coming from this little vessel of emotions
45. Yesterday we knew who became the King David in American Idol, & I must say, I'm kinda happy about the results but you really can't help being sad especially you already have two Davids in your life... but aside from A.I., what really happened in my life yesterday & today wasn't really all that red-carpety(?), glamorous, star-studded, teary-eyed experience... I know, I suck at grammar! Damn it!
46. As for me, I need an intradermal of Hale's new songs, my future wife & you know it... my David Archuleyva lol
47. Awhile ago I was thinking it's better to skip all these things right now or fast forward life because I know you'll end up living all your dreams by having this certain kind of acheivement, but I know that's not possible & that's just the way it is for us to learn, so I'll be happy having all you people around.
48. She's kinda like the best mom of the year in the anger management category... I'm not really affected, though because I know she's having a pretty rough time managing us three alone, but of course, I, again, have to sacrfice myself for her to put all the anger she has.
49. THE HILLS HAVE "ICE" II... Higher Heels Than Ever!!!
50. The cliche "coming soon" is not really what I am excited of. There's so many ways to celebrate another college stepping stone but I guess I have to put these one down for good.
51. My series will really be a bummer to me, but I guess Mr. Life, not to mention Mr. Mananquil, are enjoying it for the purpose of entertainment. Gosh, that's why I hate live reality t.v. shows.
52. Alone...
53. Though we always find that June is rather a negative month for some of us, well... let's just say school has got to start somewhere in this year, right? Okay, that was the most lamest excuse of the century lol.
54. June 14, 2011- A suprising mark in the history of music industry has been made as international popstar icon Allan Leyva finished his last concert on his Faith & Fate World Concert Tour where millions & millions of people crowded inside & outside of Kodak Theater.
55. The start of this school year isn't really what I expected to be. Changes come in different shapes & sizes, & this one's a suprising thought for quite a while now.
56. June 19, 2011- Another tandem has made quite a show in the first event of the Charity tour in Utah, making it as a successful event leaving the audince having goosebumps all over their body.
57. I've always been a silver lining boy, but pain can't go away until you show it to everyone else. All this problems right now are just conflicting me to live my life at the fullest; everybody's dumping it in to me, & I can't even give it to somebody else because just to break the ice, I'm my own family.
58. I just realized that a simple piece of paper or, in my case, a blank space for you to write in your thoughts & miseries might be more faithful & trustworthy than to everybody else. You know, a paper never complains to what we say or to what we feel, they just listen to you.
59. About time I emptied my eyes out again. Somehow, it helped me coping up with all the depression I've been having... all I need now is peace, silence & everything else that goes with them.
60. Lately I've never been Mr. Sunshine & watching One Tree Hill keeps me occupied in my studies, but right now, I just wanna stay focus & finish this thing fast & enjoy it every once in awhile. Without further ado, let's just close this one up.
Okay! That was the last one of it. I've never been happier tonight. Still got to finish a presentation but it's all good. Thank you to everyone who ride the waves with me here in LJ. :D
God bless & goodnight everyone. Happy 100th Post to all of us. :)
Special thanks to Icey, Cathy, Karren, Mafe & Anj. :D
Signing off, Archuleyva :D
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