2011

Seminar. Studies. Losing friends. Transcript of Records. Graduation. Work. Resignation. Review. Review. Review. Board Exams. Christmas. New Year.
 

This year is all about fire & desire. I'm ready.

These were the words that probably summarize my life in 2010. Obviously, it was way better than 2009. I mean, both years have dramas, but at least the big '10 didn't consist of me almost getting kicked out of school, or the fact that I had to choose between pursuing a bad path to save my good reputation or ending a reputation for a path that I was originally supposed to be in. Well, I had to suffer the consequences in either options anyway, & I'm not really that popular in the first place, so I guess I went with the latter one. The one that was right for me. For everybody.
  
& it turned out to be, like I said, better than 2009.
  
So we have to move forward again. & now it's 2011. There's something about this year 2010 hadn't brought out... & this is desire.

I'm firing up this year. With a promise to update weekly, or even daily like before. This year, it's going to be different. This year, it's going to be all about my strength & capabilities.
  

I'm a firework, Aldrinne :)

214th Song- Love You Know

Love You Know

Allan Aldrinne Leyva

Twenty one

You always hate the number twenty one

You associate these things to me

& I’ll believe

My mistake

Is that I grew up to someone you hate

You associate your heart to me

So you’ll be free

(Chorus)

If you think it’s me

& the way you see

Ask yourself in what you feel

If you think it’s wrong

& we don’t belong

I can’t guess the love you know

They agree

It’s just you’re scared to what they’ll think of me

I don’t know the love you’re looking for

I’m not enough

   

My mistake

Is that I don’t mean to destroy your faith

It’s not that I don’t have the time to wait

‘Till it’s too late

(Repeat Chorus)

   

If you think I’m bored

Then why you close your door?

Tell me if I’m worth the fall

If you know you’re right

Then you can leave tonight

Just tell me if you don’t love me anymore

  

Twenty one

You always hate the number twenty one

But it seems it’s just the way you feel

That changed you here

(Repeat Chorus)

Lefty Love

Hey everyone! It really has been awhile since I get to speak with you guys. After school world, I never thought I'm busier in the employment world. Well, I wasn't really that busy but when transitions come into your life, you tend to leave some of the things that really matter to you. & one of them is blogging.

 

Well, at least I still get to post something from my old friend LJ before this month will end. I really have a lot of things to tell you about, starting from my employment epiphanies, my brother being admitted to the hospital due to the very dangerous Dengue Hemorrhagic Fever, my paternal rants, my lack of time to write new songs up until my weight-gaining issues.

 

Anyways, months ago I was excited to be in this company I've been working at. I was really happy having my first job & all that. It was challenging, being the subject for rude comments & violent reactions, but I still get to have satisfaction from those other callers who have been giving me some great comments & feedbacks in my work. Not to mention I was fitting from my co-pilots there, navigating into the insurance sky together. Except for some people there...

 

But then again, as I finished watching the last season of Ugly Betty (which is a bummer), I asked myself if this is really what I wanted. I mean, it's great for me to work on m communication skills & learn about insurance policies & all that, but is this really the work that I wanted?

 

When I was still studying I always get to dream of working in a big hospital abroad while still being a singer sharing his compositions to the world. It was, by far, the bestest thing in the whole world. & just thinking about it always make me so inspired, which is why I get to write more & more songs.

 

I know it was a big dream. But I believe it will happen in time.It's just that I don't have any idea which path it will take me to reach it. Being stuck in a work that wasn't my interest isn't really helping at all. That is why I'm trying hard to look for something that can take me farther from what I'm supposed to become next. I think I need more inspiration & guidance, & that is why I defined myself as Mr. Change.

 

Two weeks ago, my family got an unexpected unfortunate event where it involved my brother suffering from a 3rd grade dengue hemorrhagic fever. It was really devastating seeing him struggle in the first few days in the hospital, trying to fight the illness away. What got me worried was the fact that his heart rate was declining, & the fact that his bleeding internally made my concentration level from work a little bit awful. But God never ignored our prayers, & after a week, he got better. I get to learn to love my family more than ever. Note to self, get a health insurance right away.

 

I also started to lose some weight again since I let myself go again, & I had a little accident where it involves ripping my pants in the butt part of my jeans, which is embarrassing... but funny as heck! But then again, I still want to pat myself on the back for taking care of myself. Health is wealth, after all.

 

So I really really am sorry for the huge delay from posting my compositions here. I promise to make more updates & get really serious in my writing gift. For now, I get to inspire myself again & do some really important things today. Ü

 

Giving more lefty lovin', Aldrinne :)

HairDone

Hey guys! So I just watched too many Ugly Betty episodes today (I know... I'm terribly late with the series) that I forgot to put up a new blog post before I sleep a vampire sleep. Anyways, it has been a mundane day for me.

But knowing myself, I have got to find a way how to spice up things a little bit. Because I've been meaning to try a different hairstyle that doesn't get too crowded on my head (can I say that?), I had a haircut today! It's some sort of a Mohawk with a little shave on the sides! & I know it's like a really small thing, but having a new do is one of my go-to to satisfy my 'trying new ideas everyday' kind of midyear resolution.

Well, it's pretty much all I can share. But I just wanted to make a big deal out of it in a positive way, I think. & I really needed to make a Twitter account again, update myself on all my blogger buddies' blogs, post some songs again, record a song & share it to you guys (I'm thinking about it), & pretty much what I do best- to be available... uhm, that didn't sound right. lol

Setting up my social calendar for the nth time, Aldrinne :D

  

P.S. Photo.Not.Me... I really really wish it was though. lol

New Blogging Season

Hey guys! It's a whole new LJ blogging season this month. I really needed that absence since I took up some things that increased my maturity level up to almost fifty percent.

A lot of things have happened after I took off from the blogosphere. To tell you the truth I have been posting some blog posts but I saved them as drafts. I was ambivalent during those times, & posting some private (more like emotional) things required me to think them over.

My absence here gave me a clean slate. It was good. From then on I became employed, which is going so well since I fell in love with my job; I attended a wedding... well, a wedding reception; saw a bunch of movies; watched a lot of series; focused on my physical & spiritual sides by doing Yoga, weight training & attending church every Fridays & Sundays; hanged out with some old friends; made a slideshow; recorded a song; & basically tried a lot of new things.

It was a whole lot of adventures. & I just keep on growing & growing (I wish I could also say that to my height though) that I decided to make the world my own personal classroom. There were a couple of bad dramas that have happened, but they were all trifles that I actually forgot what they are (lol). 

I also missed my blogging entourage. They actually helped me through a bunch of decisions. & blogging made it possible for me to relate to them.

Anyways, I have a whole lot of things to do this serene Sunday. But I'll keep on updating you from now & then. Gees I really missed this! I missed everyone! God bless & have a good day guys.

Ready for some blupdates, Aldrinne :D

213th Song- What You've Done

What You’ve Done

Allan Aldrinne Leyva

   

(Chorus)

Look at what you’ve done to me

Don’t be proud in what you’ll see

I’m talking ‘bout this pain I feel

Don’t be alarm for this is real

   

I want to ask

Why it’s not enough

You see, I gave my all

Let myself fall

If it’s too hard for you to feel

I know that you can see

The wrong things you have given me

While I give the things that you need

(Repeat Chorus)

  

For this is real (Repeat 2X)

You really don’t need me here

So it’s enough to set me free

Cause all the pain that you are giving me

It’s enough for me to bleed

(Repeat Chorus)

  

I wish I could go back in time

& undo all the things we left behind

We can just fall in love

But you chose to fall apart

But you chose to fall apart

But you chose to fall apart

(Repeat Chorus 2X)

  

What you’ve done is real

(Repeat 3X)

212th Song- You Wouldn't Know

You Wouldn’t Know

Allan Aldrinne Leyva

   

Everyday there’s a possibility

Of you falling in love with me

Though if I ask you

You would always say ‘maybe’

   

We always say that we should take it slow

& in the process I gave my all

The saddest thing about it was

You grew tried to fall

  

(Chorus)

I just can’t believe

You’ve given up on me

It’s never wrong cause

You wouldn’t know

I can’t help but think

You bid hello to leave

Love’s never wrong cause

You wouldn’t know

  

It’s me & my stupidity

Who’s always there for you to feel

Be loved, be treated like 

Someone with royalty

   

I thought it’s just the way you act

But I feel you’re not coming back

I’ve put up with your endeavors

Still you can’t feel

(Repeat Chorus)

  

(You wouldn’t know)

You’re narrow-minded when it comes to love

I thought we’re happy while we are growing up

I’ve always thought you were the one

But you wouldn’t know

(Instrumental)

(Repeat Chorus 2X)

Employ-Meant After All

Click here for the previous post :)

Hey everyone! So I'm going to tell you a little plan that I devised to really get the job I was talking about yesterday. Even though this Plan B might be a little risky at first, because of the fact that the company I applied into has no office hours during the weekends, I still pulled it off in the end. & you know what, I think what I did today was more than what I have expected for myself.

So you guys knew about my dilemma about waking up thirty minutes before the scheduled exams & interview yesterday. It really got me devastated & then I inculcated about God having other big plans for me so I'm just gonna let go of this one & move on. I wasn't really prepared as well, so it might be better to miss it in the first place than to pull off a suicide stunt.

But as I was curling up to my bed, regressing, I thought about what a blogger in Nuffnang told me- it's better to be late & try it than not trying it at all. That really got me asking to myself. You see, even though I'm sure God has a plan for me, is missing out the interview & exam really means that God has another company set out for me? Or He just want me to get another chance to 'really' study hard & 'really' prepare for it?

I've thought it for a moment. A really long moment though. When I woke up & saw how much encouragement & support my mom, my super dad, my aunt & my grandmother were giving me, I decided to went over there tomorrow, Saturday morning, earlier than eight o'clock & completely furnished & ready. There was this spark of hope, although too little to be seen & felt, that built my optimism up from eight percent to eighty.

So last night, when I finished blogging & all that, I started to go through the sites talking about successfully getting the job & some interview tips. To my surprise, almost all the things that I've read  there didn't occur to me when I was applying for a job in the previous company. From the appropriate outfit up until the answers to the common job interview questions, I was completely dumbfounded by these realizations. It wasn't easy at all, I thought. I also took the time to deeply study the company from the products & services that they were offering, to the company's mission, vision & history.

I woke up at around three o'clock in the morning, only having two hours of sleep. & I began to rehash all the things that needed to be done for the interview & exam. It was risky, cause even when I want them to know that I do know that it'll be scheduled today & not yesterday by just showing up, I don't have any assurance that the office there was operating on weekends.

I still went straight there, & to my surprise... it was empty. No one was there but a guard & the maintenance team. It was seven o'clock in the morning, but I still waited for someone there to show up & give me the test & the interview. & an hour passed still no sign of employees there. I was kinda falling asleep on my chair, & I didn't even have a heavy breakfast & water to ease my insides. I prayed to God once again... & boy am I glad to see all these people coming in.

The people in that company were all nice; they actually treated me as if they're the ones who needs to get interviewed. I still felt jittery, but it wasn't out of nervousness, but because I was just hungry. & in the end, I even got a thumbs up on my exam & some compliments from the interviewer herself. The plan was a success, & I'm lucky enough to pass them all even when my chances were really that small.

So now I'm scheduled for the final interview in my real office, the one when I will be working in, on whenever the interviewer has decided. & I really want to thank my family for the encouragement & the push, to God who never fails to impress me (I love you!), & to my fellow bloggers as well who did not just cheered me up throughout the entire time I was devastated, but also for giving me the advice & the inspiration just like my real & true friends are giving. Have a blessed day everyone! I'm gonna go eat dinner now! :)

There will always be glimpses of hope, Aldrinne :D

211th Song- Right

 This song that I wrote has a concept of 'if being wrong is the only way for you to come back, then I don't want to be right.' Well, something like that. It's kinda ironic, cause I'm writing a song entitled 'Right' since I'm a lefty myself (isn't it obvious?) lol.

Okay, just wanna thank those bloggers awhile ago who have been cheering me up from the 'incident' awhile ago. I just took a very long nap & I feel slightly recharged. & to those bloggers who have been encouraging me to sing my song on Youtube, I'm fifty percent reconsidering it now lol. It's a start, right? Thank you everyone! Here's the lyrics of Right! :D

   

Right

Allan Aldrinne Leyva

Don’t speak so softly

I can’t hear what you’re trying to say

I see you now shouting

It seems I just can’t understand

  

Maybe I don’t wanna hear it

Maybe I just couldn’t take it so good

I wish my hunch is just a mistake

Cause baby, my feelings, I cannot fake

  

(Chorus)

But you made me realize

That in the end I was right

After some time

You bid your goodbye

But baby, I’ve to deny

All those reasons why

You have to leave me here

I never ever really wanna be right

Please take a moment

You don’t have to see who’s involved in

You’ve knocked on my door now

There’s no going back from me now

Cause maybe I found love, it’s in you

Maybe with you, I’m feeling so good

I know what you want me to do

Call me a fool, but I just can’t undo

(Repeat Chorus)

  

(Instrumental)

Don’t speak so softly

I can’t hear you’re trying to say

It’s better this way

So I can love you even just for one more day

(Repeat Chorus 3X)

  

I never ever really wanna be right

Employ-not-meant

I think the only way for me to lease this problem & feel better is by doing a blog post about it. It's the only thing that doesn't talk back, & I seriously need some ears for the moment.

So yesterday I got a call from the company I applied in last week. It was actually, for a fresh graduate, a dream job for me; not only that the office is like five minutes from my house, it's also based in the medical field (I actually prefer jobs related to my course). I don't actually care about my salary, just having a job like this one can actually make me happy.

This week, I actually wake up earlier than my usual. Even though I sleep late, I always wake up at four or five in the morning. & the thing about that is, I don't even have something very important to do. I instantly start surfing the net to make an early blog post, & I even make a song whenever caffeine & creativity is kicking in too much.

So my final job interview was schedules at eight o'clock in the morning at their other office venue somewhere in Makati. & last night I was constantly preparing for it; I studied about tips on job interviews, reviewed some abstract test, put out my best corporate attire, & prayed to God for wisdom. I slept at around one o'clock. Seven hours until the interview.

That's when I made one big mistake.
  
I actually woke up at around three o'clock. It was still early & dark outside, & if I was going to sleep rather than a nap for bedtime, I would've been so sleepy in my interview especially in the examination. I decided to sleep for an hour or two just to catch up on my sleeping.

When I wake up, I looked straight to the window to find out that's it's now too bright outside. I quickly took a glance on my cellphone- it was 7:38 AM. It took me a moment to realize this is happening; I know I heard the alarm screaming at my ear & I know I was going to go out my bed after a minute. 'What just happened?'

I went out the bedroom & just sit there, eyes staring blankly, hands clumped together, praying for another chance to do it all over again & get out of bed even at three o'clock. It was too late. I browsed through my phone & texted my aunt for advice. It was really too late. This time I had no plan B to think of.

So now, I'm still stuck here in front of the computer ranting all these to you. But I actually thought about God & His plans for me. Even if this is actually a dream job for me, God is telling me there's a bigger place for me out there & I just need to search for it. These all happened for a reason, & I just need to appreciate the better things that will soon be coming straight at me. Have a great day everyone! Happy birthday to my very dear best friend, Karen Yap! I really miss her!

Recharging, Aldrinne