Leave me RESTLESS

Who would've thought I was out from the blogosphere for five days already? It just shows that I had a very productive... over-productive even, & a very fun fun week! Amidst the restless days & nights I had, at least I was awake for a reason... & I patted myself on the back for that.

Unfortunately, I also had to skip blogging too. Primary reason: An embarrassing declination in my Midterm grades (From 92 to an astounding 79). I don't blame blogging, really, but it's just that my professor & at the same time my favorite pastor noticed that my performances weren't good enough, & it seems like I'm putting too much time on blogging.

When I looked at my blog, I told myself 'Okay... something has gotta change. First of all, I'm not a reporter who has to blab about everything he notices 24/7.' After that realization, it was a very different week.

Thursday: Apart from the happy learning experience we had during NCM104, we celebrated Ate Nikki's birthday at her dorm. Even though I stayed only for two hours or less, I still had a good laugh in our get-together.  Kudos to Ate Nikki who got her package (by the way) last Sunday.
Friday: It's funny how a simple cold can turn into an awful flu. Seriously, my immune system just couldn't take it anymore last Friday; good thing I already had a return demonstration last week because I couldn't get myself up to go to school.

After my rest from the early morning until almost five o'clock in the afternoon, my siblings & I visited my Grandpa Dan who arrived in the States last week ago & was currently residing at Astoria Plaza Hotel. My grandmother, my aunt & my two cute cousins were there & I was overjoyed when I saw how big they are already. It was really cool to see my extended family again!

Saturday: How could you not enjoy a Saturday morning, right? The only difference was I still have my Audit classes during the weekends. It sucks... but my day wasn't that bad because our Audit mentor was really, really caring.

Not only did she notice that I am half-Chinese (cause not all people can tell I have a Chinese blood), she also complimented my skin tone lol, but I didn't love her for that... she was a good speaker & she makes everything so simple about Psychiatric Nursing.

After the audit class, I was surprised I slept for almost ten hours from the moment I arrived home until four hours before the start of my Audit class. It wasn't that really good because too much sleep doesn't mean you have more energy.

Sunday: I'm just really happy that I still get to have lots of time to study my notes before the two post-exams were given to us... & our mentor made sure we understand her lecture before the tests. So in the end, I got a perfect score on the first exam & a fair score of twenty points over twenty five on the second.

After the exams, Ate Nikki & I went straight to church. After that, I went to Eric's condo to sleep there because it was closer to the place for tomorrow's duty- San Lazaro Hospital. Rackie, Eric & I had a nice psych review & italian dinner.

Monday: I woke up, sleep deprived, at five o'clock in the morning for our orientation in San Lazaro Hospital. An hour of grooming & final landmark reviews later, I went to the hospital & arrived five minutes after seven o'clock.

We had our orientation at around nine thirty so I read some psych notes to kill some time. After the orientation, I went straight to my house to rest. Unfortunately, the whole subdivision had no electricity because the company was fixing the wires.

I was kinda pissed off from that event so I texted my grandmother if they're at the hotel right now so I could chill there at the moment. I went to Megamall with my little sister & had lunch there with my grandpa Dan and my grandmother & spent the whole day watching the news (about politics), eating nutritious food, & taking a warm & relaxing semi-bubble bath at the hotel. I needed that.

My little sister & I went to Megamall again afterwards to meet up with my mom & my aunt Gina who visited the Philippines again with her aunt. I really missed her so much! We went to Renaissance Hotel in Ayala to give us some stuff & to rest for a moment, then we went home after that.

After we arrive home, I packed my things again & went to Eric's condo again to sleep there. It was like eleven o'clock in the evening & I still haven't started on my research paper that was assigned to me. I almost had an all-nighter after that & then I woke up late... like a quarter to six o'clock in the morning.

Today: When I opened my eyes, Beps was horrifyingly surprised by what she saw- two red eyes adjusting to the light from the outside. Yes! I woke up with my adrenalin, drank half a cup of coffee to keep me awake & spent the whole trip worrying about my red eyes... might scare some people in the train. Ate Almira & I met up with each other on the LRT station & succeeded in our goal of avoiding tardiness when we arrived ten minutes after the call time.


So I went with Kuya Henry on the way back to the EDSA Shaw Station after our duty. I had a fulfilling brunch at Jollibee before I went home. Now I'm sitting here in my room, full blast on the AC... & will rest for awhile.

I think I'm excused to stay out of my normal blog length today, huh? I mean, I was gone for six days anyways. lol Ahh! You know what, God really knows what you needed from time to time. So I'll see you all later?

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D

666,999 & 2012

I have had a repressed memory of an accident that happened during 1999 in December. We were sleeping that night when mom felt the ground shaking- I guess we experienced a terrible earthquake that alarmed the whole family & the whole country as well.


Of course, the earthquake acted like a faulty tectonic drift, & it was somehow faint compared to the other places that not only destroyed some buildings and houses, but some lives too. I was barely a conscious then, but I even remember mom shouting my little brother's name who was still asleep while the walls are closely falling in. That night, after the earthquake, my family composed a little prayer to thank God for protecting us from the short but alarming catastrophe.

So the reports came in the early morning & the earthquake sure made a mess in different regions before it gets away. The thing that caught my attention the most was about the accident in terms of astronomy-thingy, which talked about the relevance of the year 1999 to the number 666. It scared me to death watching that segment, & being a nine year old that time, I sure did believed that the two sets of numbers has an odd significance.

Today, it's September 9, 2009... 9/9/9. At first I thought it was a lucky day too, cause last year we anticipated August 8, 2008. China can proved that to us, right? As I typed in those three numbers, the events that happened in the year 1999 suddenly got into me, further increasing my anxiety.

What if 999 was almost similar to that of the past disaster? Is 999 of today the same with 666? Why is 666 bad anyway? Furthermore, is the date 12/12/12 relevant to the end of the world (based on the upcoming movie 2012)?

They say that the number 666 (as found on the book of Revelations 13:11-18) is defined as the number of men, or the unholy trinity- Satan, the false prophet & the Antichrist.

The start of chapter 12 says that the first dragon was Satan, & was slain by the angels above. So when Satan, in the form of that first dragon, was casted out, he then transformed into a second dragon. As it was said on the verse, it was defined as the beast that is coming out of the earth; it has two horns like a lamb, but spoke like a dragon.

Based on my understanding & research, it was actually more like a fake god, a fake follower or that guy's simply bad news! That whoever has the mark of those set of similar numbers, is more likely a follower of Satan, a false prophet whom I imagine is like the person who shouts 'the end is near!' in televisions or claims that he is the true god, or the antichrists which is a group of people who, obviously, hate Jesus Christ.

So in my epiphany just now, I think what happened on December 13, 1999, was just associated with the numbers 666 because we actually tend to over rationalized our faith. In a multiple-choice type of question, it can probably look something like this:

What is the sum of 9 & 8?
A. 17
B. Infinite! Because when you translated the number eight into greek, it means something like the infinite symbol... blah blah blah
C. 17? (lol)
D. None of the above. 9 & 8 cannot be added together, for the law of.. blah blah blah
(By the way, if I have to choose between those choices, I choose letter C. cause it cracked me up a little... I know, brain concussion again)

You see what I mean? Filipinos tend to over rationalize sometimes, including me, of course... it helps us somehow but it can also causes us to our downfall.... & by downfall I mean the pre-exam test on Course Audit due to over rationalization lol. Seriously though, 1999 was a great year amidst the tribulation the world has received.

For it is said in the book of John 16:33 that we live in a world full of tribulation: but don't fret, guys, for God have overcome the world. 1999 was just one of the million examples of why we live in a fallen world... & it was our fault from the start, the reason why there are sufferings too. However, if you look upon Jesus Christ's sufferings, how He offered Himself so that we could be cleansed from our sins, it was more than painful than any of the things we have experienced... & all we need to do is to hold unto Him in good times & bad times. Have faith!

So who is this man who has that mark of the number 666? Will he cause so much tribulation to the point that we'll suffer in the end, then?

Good point. As I was reading some of the forums & some sites about the number 666, some people said the Bible actually was referring it to Nero, the emperor during those times. Because Christians were being persecuted before (they actually thought of them as witches & then they'll burn their head on top of a post... a lamp post actually), they tend to give people & things some codes. Like the name Jesus Christ who can be translated to a number 888, or to others, as a fish (that's why you see the fish symbol). Nero was referred too as a follower of Satan, a false prophet & an antichrist.

During our times, well, not really our times... more like our grandmother's grandmother's grandmother's times (lol), Adolf Hitler with his famous Swastika was symbolized as the man with the mark of 666 because of what he did during those years of Jewish slavery & persecution. In the Philippines, I'm not sure, but I recently read something about Marcos having that mark.

Even though Nero, Hitler or Marcos was considered as the man with the 666 mark by some people, somewhere down the line we have to consider the fact that they are merely just mortal sinners just like us too.

God isn't SELECTIVE, guys. Sometimes we have a misconception about God having that personality but it's not true at all. As it is said on Psalms 103:2-5, God doesn't categorize our sins according to how we categorize it. A SIN IS A SIN when it comes to God.. no matter how low or severe a sin was.

We tend to judge people... condemning them to the point of terminating them. I'm telling you now, that your sins are equal to their sins, no matter how much destruction it may or may not bring. Again, A SIN IS A SIN, people.

So, in my own conclusion, we are therefore just like the emperor Nero, or Adolf Hitler or our former president Marcos who committed a lot of sins that almost affected many people or nations. You know what, if we sin, our God is also affected... & He is bigger than anything you could've imagine, so just think about it... we are the ones who categorize our sins... not Him.

So to sum it all up again, anyone can be a potential owner of the mark 666. It doesn't talk about one person only... it talks about MEN- 666 as the number  of MEN. So all the people in this world can either be a follower of Satan, a false prophet & an anti-christ if he did not accept Christ as His own personal Lord & Savior? Yes. 666 is just a number, but I tell you what... for me, 6-6-6 is actually SIN-SIN-SIN! It rhymes, doesn't it?

So what happens on December 12, 2012 then?

 I'm not against the movie 2012 whatsoever... cause I'm sure gonna watch the movie myself too lol. It seems an interesting way to predict whether 2012 is the end of the world, but to tell you the truth... I'm not really sure about it.

In fact, no one even knows about it except God (Luke 9:25). How are those other souls going to be saved then? Well, God promised us in Revelations that He will not permit His second coming until the word has spread throughout the nations.

So there's still time? There is... but don't be complacent. He can come anytime, as long as His love is foretold to all the people in all the nations of this world. That is our purpose then... to spread the word, or spread the LOVE of our God. Amen!

& don't be afraid to even say that SIN-SIN-SIN word... because even though we try to be 666 people sometimes... the word 999 still exist! What does it mean? SALVATION-SALVATION-SALVATION! Now isn't that wonderful? :)

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D

Tuesdays with Aldrinne

One... two... finally! I was counting my absences in my blog calendar on my sidebar & two days of jumping to different places started to ruin my normal body clock & my blog rankings... making it from 400th to 710th place. Boo!

Amidst the fun time I had last last night with my classmates in church & with my best friend Eric in the movie house, I wasn't that lucky enough in my semi-final (or should I say pre-final) examination. It wasn't really our fault even if we studied for that, because it was unbelievably difficult.

I just hate it when I fail (then again, who doesn't?), especially when my score was almost close on the passing grade. Before going to church, I was really depressed although I know it's part of learning... it's the grade part I'm worried about.

It was the sound of praise & worship that serenaded my worried heart; I was bound to feel that way cause I couldn't change anything anyway, & I know I just got to have faith in Him... as long as the future's intact with God's will, then I'm happy about it. After all, faith is blind... but it sure doesn't have to open its eyes to walk.

After the Sunday service, Eric & I hanged out a little outside the mall & went back to catch the ten o'clock movie. We planned to watch Eugene Domingo's blockbuster hit 'Kimmy Dora' & we're incredibly thankful that we did.


I have to say, Kimmy Dora was the only filipino movie that was so additively high-larious! Seriously, it was the best comedy movie I've ever watched throughout my whole life. How Eugene portrayed her two characters was a two-thumbs up & you can really see the hard work they've put just to give the entertainment this country needs. Even those old slapsticks you always see in tagalog movies was incredibly funny as if it was new. & it was pure brilliance how she did so well from the start upto the end of the movie. Her drama scenes weren't corny too... all in all, it's the best movie of the year, & this maybe Eugene's biggest break to finally conquer that 'queen of comedy' title which I don't know who currently is. lol

That movie lifted my spirits up! You see, everytime we're down, God is delighted to prosper us, to give us the things we needed, & to give us the life according to His will. All we need is more faith to walk with Him along our journey through life.

Yesterday, apart from our group meeting for our socialization in the Center for National Mental Health today, I got off from the worry world & fixed myself with my bed, just to catch up with my sleeplessness. I think I'm winning now, but I guess it's only for now that I'm taking the first lead. I still have to undergo lots of pressure especially that the board exam, together with the IELTS & NCLEX, is almost near... but I'm lucky I have the people & the GOD I need with me.

Forever thankful. Forever faithful. & now I have to prepare for our duty now. I still have to catch up with my interpersonal techniques so I have to end up here. God bless & take care everyone. Joy! Joy! Joy! :)

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D

Magis!

"Allan Leyva has a new blog post! Click here to find out!"

Wish someone would do that for me even when I don't have anything to say... you know, when I post my compositions? lol

So inspite from being totally spaced out after a fast-track review in our Audit, I spent my remaining time reading some of my notes, a couple of books (two books actually...) & some verses in the Bible, wrote some songs in my notebook, & temporarily caught up with my circadian rhythm... for now.

Yes, I was in my room alone & it was nice. Sometimes you have to anticipate serenity amidst our busy lifestyles. However, how weird is our country's events these past few weeks? Politics have been diverged lately, & the presidential race is all over the news. I think it compensates our fears of our country from getting worst because there are a lot of promising people who will be running for next year's presidential elections.

However, it still doesn't change the fact that we're not feeling any change in our country. We still have high hopes, but it's not really doing any good. Anyways, I know that God is the only answer to our country's development & that His powers are designed in these times of depression. After all, He is not an option... He is the only solution.

Speaking of miracles, I'm really waiting for my songs to reappear in my folder. It was difficult for me to accept that almost 40% of my compositions have been missing. The songs in my flash disk too weren't there when I check them, so it's too depressing for me.

I know I'm a little bit exaggerating but those songs were like my children; they were born from my feelings & my ideas in life & losing them feels like losing your art the next time you re-write those songs. Sad... but true.

Just wanted to share to you this book I've been reading about. I actually hate myself for not reading this when I received this book way back 2004... well, I did read a few pages but I was so fantasy-oriented back then, & I prefer reading wizardry than reality. Again, I hate myself for that, cause she was my mom's friend (I think) & there was a signature signed by Ms. Lee-Chua herself, who was one of the people who spelled my name 'Allan' right. It's really one of the nicest books yet & it's actually dedicated to all Ateneans.

What? I was a part of Ateneo too when I enrolled there for swimming training during the summer when I was in high school... besides, I think you don't have to study in ADMU just to be an Atenean too, right?

Anyways, just have to thank you again for the blog visits & the support. You guys are great cause you still visit this site even when I don't update too much. God bless & have a blessed Sunday.

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D

164th Song- Limited Love

Limited Love

Allan Aldrinne Leyva

When was the last time you said yes,

To a commitment though you wanted to say no?

What choices can you make,

Today to say no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no

To a limited (love)?

Don’t be seduced

By their orange eyes

They have many qualities

That will make you feel so high

You can open your eyes

But don’t be blind

Whatever you carry out, just be alright

Cause there are some times, you have to be real

To say no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no

To a limited love

(Chorus)

No to a limited love

(Limited) love

No to a limited love

No to all their seductions

No to a limited love

Say no to all distractions

Limited love is a great pretender

Let’s say you’re earning for yourself

Then this girl quickly enters

Your world, it’s now in catastrophes

Don’t tell me it’s false

That I am really that wrong

Sooner or later

You’ve end up sane, agreeing to me

(Repeat Chorus)

(Love, love, love, love, love)

I know it’s a limited

(Love, love, love, love, love)

Yes I know I’m getting insane about

(Love, love, love, love, love)

Love, love, love, love, love

Sudden Plunge

It's surprising how I still stay wide awake for almost twenty one hours now. You see, ol' gastrointestinal system takes a lot of time digesting that two cups of coffee (which was bad to anyone's age), prolonging these sympathetic effects in my body... lol

Anyways, I sincerely apologize for the late post... I didn't have any time to write something awhile ago, & I was really doing my best in my new style of studying- cramming (Okay.. I'm feeling that dizziness now).

Just kidding (kinda), well... it was really one of the most productive days though, maybe because of that 230-point quiz I was blabbing about awhile ago in my Facebook, Twitter & Plurk account. But seriously, even though I'm sure I'm gonna get a low score again, at least I still get to remember the things I really did memorize when I got off my complacent-side.

& it's surprising, too, that God took away my fever & colds in no time even if I lack too much sleep. It's kinda ironic when you look at this way- running from a runny nose... lol I crack myself up (Sorry, having a brain concussion)! Well, I guess the exam's time limit was far too much for us, so I guess I needed to be well anyways.

So I was kinda disappointed to myself for not really doing my 100% on that exam, & that got me blanked during our lecture. But you know what, after our Thursday Bible group study, I felt a lot better; it was more of a choice too, I guess... cause I hate having bad days.

I visited Lefty's Righty awhile ago just to check up on my little site & was surprised when I saw its rank. I really don't believe too much about lucky numbers, but then again, there's no harm when you know you're being positive.

Anyways, thank you for those who visited & dropped some sweet comments. Your get-well-soon messages are so much better than those Hallmark cards you buy. To those who nominated me in Nuffnang Awards, thank you thank you so much for killing some time just to nominate me. To those bloggers who still wanted to add their header on my Ads.Blogs.Collabs, feel free to drop your site's URL there & I'm gonna do the rest... I love doing it anyways- it feels like we're trying to make a huge campaign here.

So much for that... I'm going to take a little rest for the moment & later I'll start visiting your blogs! Yahoo! God bless & see yah later! *winks*

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D

Colds & Flaws

Oh I really hate fate inducing all these bad things. Although I try to be positive, it really pushed me to my limit... physically & mentally. lol

It's not really a bad day, but I don't like waking up late in the morning after a prolonged hibernation; it makes me anemic, gives me gastrointestinal disturbances & these very little hand & leg tremors that really suck big time.

I'd let those things out of my mind though, cause awhile ago I was preparing for a pretest for our topic today. I checked my blog for some updates too & it was sad to see our rank was moved from 420 to 446 again. Dang it, but I still have to focus on the exam-part.

Before the start of our class, I got a weird cold that turned to a flu then slightly to a fever. It was too much for me that it ruined my thought processes when we were having the test now. Cognition isn't really present when intense signs & symptoms of colds are there.

I didn't really fail the quiz though, but it wasn't also my best performance. The same with my Midterm grades too, which was really surprising; even though there was improvement in my grades in my NCM A, NCM B got a shameful grade of 79 (I was 92 in my Prelim). Well, I'm kinda expecting it anyways cause I got a little complacent from it. I wish I pushed a little more effort though.

So I went home having this massive headache & runny nose until now & it sucks cause tomorrow I think we have a 230-point quiz. Apart from that, I still have to make an early start with my assignment for Friday's Skills class & our activities on Monday in National Center for Mental Health. Is it okay if I turn an early night, guys? Promise I'll make it all up to you!

A shoutout to my blogger friends & my readers on Friendster, Facebook, Twitter & Plurk. I still am working on my Lefty's Righty & my new blog on Tumblr. Argh, this headache is killing me. I still am looking forward to a brand new day... or night later. lol

Hello future auto-immune diseases! (Knocks on wood) lol... Medicine's kicking in now so I have to rest now...

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D

Glitches

Everytime I stand up, there's always a reason why we have to fall down. & it's impossible to get through without a fight, but then again, even in those darkest times... true friends appear.

To be perfectly honest, I haven't been feeling like the old me again- it was much more serene as it was before everything was destroyed; an empire whom others took credit for. I kept silent, but they were complaining.

In the end, when I was almost rising up with my downlines, they gave up. I gave up too, cause it wasn't what we wanted all along.

I told Mafe last night that even when I turn thirty years old, I know I'm never gonna regret anything I've done throughout my entire life. I didn't actually lie... it's more like an epiphany just now- it must've been better if I rejected his offer to come with him that day... to get a 'part time job' that wouldn't affect both our schedules.

That changes everything.

Some of the things I wish didn't happen was involuntarily destroying my friendship with the people who once respected me. I admit, I learned from all that stuff, but it's not really worth losing a lot (I mean, a lot!) of friends. & even when I try to make it all okay, it was a permanent scar... & I know you know that feeling of losing someone so important that was like death already.

There's so much I wanted to try & give it all back, but I couldn't... no thanks to someone whose promises just went in his pockets.

& even though the Lord forgets all my sins, I cannot just remove the dead heart I've been carrying for months now. I asked myself today "Why?" I wanted to undo these parts of my life... wanted to erase it completely, but things are involved... things are permanently scarred.

I'm just really, really lucky I still got the true friends who sheltered my reputation as long as I can remember. I still have the family that gave me the push when I needed one; those angels I constantly am thinking about in C.H.I.L.D.; God who created me not to boast about His powers but created me out of His great love for me; & of course, you bloggers & readers who have been constantly supporting me through dealing with my happiness & pain here.

Even though I want to make myself happy now, well, I couldn't really comprehend my emotions this time... but I'm thankful that this part of life is temporary & that there will be a bigger & better life that's waiting for me on the other side of this huge mountain. I appreciate Miley's song now.

Good night & have a great dream-venture everyone! I seriously love you! See you in the morning.

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne

Support In September

Last day of August didn't really go according to my plan, but the movie date last night was so worth the whole day waiting for my friends' reply. Well, at least the anti-histamine tablet was permanently excreted from my hibernation.

Anyways, I've put the new blog header for September yesterday & it looks so colorful- Support in September! It's all about the Nuffnang Blog Awards & the reason why I'm competing. I hope you like it too!

This month, I'm trying to expand my time & be twice productive just to have time for blogging. It wasn't really the plan I initiated on the start of the -ber months, but when I decided to change for the better, I've thought about how I should be trying new things than skipping a good chance... maybe finally audition to be a singer! Nah... I have to graduate first.

I'm also thankful for my friends, my readers & my fellow bloggers who keep on supporting me to one of my passions- blogging. You guys give me the kudos that I really need to keep on sharing my life & ideas. Even though sometimes I experience some bad weather... let's just say I even love rainy days!

Hogwarts Express is leaving tomorrow & I need to prepare for a whole lot of adventures lol. I just love how much my world is getting peaceful amidst all those trials & tribulations- I guess the Lord thinks I deserve this break anyhow...

So we're driving faster now & even though we might not see the path we're taking because of the ride, at least we know that faith & fate keep us appreciating the moments we've had & the path that lies ahead of us.

God bless, take care & I pray you guys had a beautiful & productive day too! I feel so wasted after a long day at National Center for Mental Health, but it was so fun spending it with my group.

By the way, Lefty's Righty will have its own content now- so it means double blogging work for me! Thank you also for the visitors yesterday, I love you!

Shaping in, shipping out, Aldrinne :D